RealityStuck
by Username1.5
Summary: SBURB finds it's way into our universe and everything gets messed up ((Swearing cause some of our coauthors have problems with filtering)) we are also up on ao3 because our story format doesn't follow the rules sorry for any inconvenience
1. Chapter 1

== Be Sollux  
You are now Sollux. Honestly, you don't know why you're even doing something so out of character right now.  
twinArmageddons began trolling samuraiPonytail  
TA: hii  
SP: Sollux-chan! XD.  
TA: what ii2 that?  
SP: What is what?  
TA: that 'chan' thing. iit2 abhorrent.  
SP: Silly Sollux-chan. Oops! I forgot!  
TA: forgot what?  
SP: People are going to die today! XD.  
TA: you 2eem exciited.  
SP: Let me rephrase. Bad people are dying today. I've got to tell Munson Burner! XD.  
TA: whatever. ii fiind your 2peciie2 weiird.  
SP: Says the troll. Hussie is such an asshole :(.  
TA: who?  
SP: He's a magical man. He created you. Every. Single. One. Of. You.  
TA: yeah, ok  
SP: It's true! Why does Karkat believe me, but not you? Come on Sollux, we have a connection! We're Doom buddies! Remember?  
TA: iif you're referriing to the fact that we 2hare an a2pect, then ye2 ii 2uppo2e we are 'doom buddiie2'  
SP: Yay! :DD.  
TA: ii ju2t made the biggest mii2take, diidn't ii?  
SP: Aw :(. Now you made me sad, Sollux.  
SP[samuraiPonytail] blocked TA[twinArmageddons]  
TA: that won't work.  
TA[twinArmageddons] ceased trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

== Be samuraiPonytail.

You are now samuraiPonytail. For security reasons, you cannot disclose your last name. Instead, you are simply SARA.

== Look around your room.

You gaze lovingly at the INUYASHA posters on your wall. Really, is there anyone more majestic than the half-breed? You don't think so, but your mother disagrees. She is more into SESSHOMARU than you care to admit.

== Cut the bullshit

Hmph. You hop out of your cool spinning chair, stretching your legs. On the computer desk lies a mangled copy of your dearest INUYASHA. You don't captchalouge it, because that kind of thing just doesn't exist. Instead, you pick it up, neatly placing it back into the bookshelf.

== Go on with introduction.

You huff at the voice(s) in your head. Really, they should learn to have some patience.

== Girl, I will cut you.  
Your name is SARA as previously stated. You love ANIME and that's all there is to it. Recently, you have gotten into the HOMESTUCK fandom, a story way to complicated to recite. You have a passion for SINGING, especially in JAPANESE, even if you can't speak it. You also have an affinity for SHOUJO MANGA. If you had a strife specibus, it would be one of the FRYING PAN kind. Damn it, you need to get one of those. Your pesterchum handle is samuraiPonytail and you type with precision because anything else would be degrading.

== Finally.

The voices in your head are very bitchy today. They've been there ever since you started to read Homestuck. Oh well, time to break the news to your good friend, magicallyScientific.

== Sara, pester magicallyScientific.

Ok, ok, sheesh. Hush up, you stupid voices.

samuraiPonytail began pestering magicallyScientific

SP: Amanda! :DDDD  
MS: what?  
SP: John died again! It's almost time! :DD.  
MS: ...that's so depressing. Why did you tell me that? And anyway, I thought the tricksters were going after Dirk?  
SP: They are~ But soon, a phenomenon unlike any other will send them here! Aren't you excited~?  
MS: Sure I am.  
SP: Then what's the problem?  
MS: Won't this fuck up the space/time/paradox shit?  
SP: You let me worry about that, Slyph of Breath.  
MS: I think I will, Knight of Doom.  
SP: I can't wait to play Sburb! :DD.  
MS: Wait, we're playing Sburb? Who, how, when, where, what?!  
SP: Hush. All will be revealed in time.  
MS: Now I wish I was Doom. All I can do is the Windy Thing, and not even that!  
SP: Hehe, you'll find out how to work it. Be patient, Amanda.  
MS: I'll try. So what'd the voices say?  
SP: They're bitching at me again. Some mafia drug lord or something close to that is going to get shot. I think it has something to do with our session, but I'm not sure...  
MS: Alright. Keep me posted.  
SP: Will do! :DD

SP [samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering MS[magicallyScientific]


	2. Chapter 2

== Be magicallyScientific

Well duh who else would you be? You're name is Amanda, you will not tolerate anyone calling you Munson Burner from this point on unless your name is Sara.

== Look around your room

Your walls are completely bare you should really hang some posters or something, you would but you may have lost them in the maze of books that is your room it might help if you would get rid of some of them- I WILL DO NO SUCH THING!

= =stop you're wasting time you should be doing something productive

But surprise surprise you continue to sit on your floor and scroll through tumblr and pester your friends from time to time, speaking of which you have a message from samuraiPonytail. She probably has some info on the trolls she wants to tell you. You were actually the person wh introduced Sara to homestuck so you would have someone to talk to about it, see not a very long story at all.

= = Answer samuraiPonytail

You then proceed to have this conversation

= = That's it? You're not going to give a proper introduction?

No.

== Be the more cooperative person

You are now Sara again. Wait, you were always Sara, you were never anyone but Sara.

== Get on with it

Bitch, I'll work at my own pace. Gog, those stupid voices are irritating. Now you know how Aradia feels.

== Deploy troll horns

You put on the troll horns you made. They're shaped like Aradia's, since she is one of your favorite trolls.

== Quit it!

Ok, ok! Stupid voices are so demanding.

== Go watch tv

You immediately switch on your small tv. It's cute and silvery and damn it you've had it since you were a fourth grader. You could never get rid of your precious baby.

== Change the channel.

You pick up the remote and change it to channel 4, because you saw it in a vision. Since it's pre-determined, you were going to do it anyway. You reflect heavily on that sentence and wonder if it even makes sense.

== Watch in sedated suspense

A building exploded. Not just any building either. It was the Eiffel Tower. Yep, you read right. The Eiffel Tower.

== Zone out

You proceed to zone out. Let's go to someone else.

== Be that mysterious guy at the computer.

You are now the mysterious guy at the computer. Actually, no. He is too mysterious to be at the moment. Let's go back to magicallyScientific.

== Be Amanda

You are now Amanda. You're not going into the whole, "But I was always Amanda!" thing. You don't do that. You're too scientific to think like that.

== Go do something.

You go do something. Tumblr is too chaotic at the moment. Maybe some fan fiction will appease your soul? You can't believe you just thought that.

== Be Andrew Hussie.

You are now Hussie. Besides fucking around with the fandom's feelings, you have nothing much to do today. You check on your little adventurers in their boat. Suddenly, a small white hole appears, and they're on a collision course.

== Panic beautifully

You proceed to flap your arms like an aquatic bird. You can't directly interfere anymore than you have and to do so would upset the universe.

== Watch the white hole

You watch as the group gets sucked in. Farther away, you see the same thing happen to those on the meteor. Fuck.

== Try to think of a solution.

Nothing comes to mind, unfortunately.

== Get pestered.

Your computer beeps, indicating a message. Curious, you click on the Pesterchum logo that wasn't there before. Your chumhandle is now andrewHussie.

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering AH[andrewHussie]

SP: Hi Hussie!  
AH: Who are you.  
SP: I can't tell you that, beautiful ;D.  
AH: You're a fan, aren't you?  
SP: Le gasp! How'd you know?  
AH: I just do.  
SP: Hehe, as expected of the beautiful Hussie.  
AH: Please don't call me beautiful. It's creepy.  
SP: Aw ;(  
AH: Why are you contacting me?  
SP: Everyone disappeared, right? I'm kind of like your guardian angel. I exist in your universe as well. I'm a Knight of Doom.  
AH: Does this mean we're all dying?  
SP: Not everyone. You'll survive Hussie. I can't think of a single instance where you died. The universe really likes you.  
AH: I see. So, what did you want to tell me?  
SP: A solution to your problem. Send the missing characters from the past here, instead of to the Alphaverse. It's your only solution. It's because of those tricksters. Time shenanigans.  
AH: The tricksters?  
SP: Yep~ Anyway, what do ya say?  
AH: I don't have much choice, do I?  
SP: Nope!  
AH: Tell me what I need to do.  
SP: You need Time and Space together. Use your scientific powers to send them onto a different course.  
AH: Will do. Huss out.

AH[andrewHussie] ceased pestering SP[samuraiPonytail]

== Be Sara.

You are now Sara. After your conversation with Hussie, you check your Memo logs.

[currentsamuraiPonytail] posted on memo at 9:30 hours.

[cSP]: The Huss is fixing shiz. I did mah part.

[futuresamuraiPonytail] responded at 500 hours.

fSP: Good job sweetie. Sollux-chan says hii.  
cSP: Hi Sollux! Anyway, what's the next step?  
fSP: AlphaBeta. You know what to do.  
cSP: Aye aye captain!

[currentsamuraiPonytail] logged off.


	3. Chapter 3

== Be the odd girl sitting on her bed at home with a dog.

You are now the odd girl sitting on her bed at home with her dog. You know she probably has a name right? We should figure that out.

== Enter name.  
Lonely interwentch.  
The girl shakes her head and jumps on her bed in protest. Nice going jackass.

== Reenter name.  
Krystal Hazlett

==

You're name is KRYSTAL HAZLETT. It is not your birthday though you wish it was. You are fourteen years old, and have a number of INTERESTS. You enjoy reading fantasy and fiction books by the dozens, though you USUALLY FAIL TO FINISH THEM DUE TO THEIR ODD HABIT OF DISAPPEARING. You love the INTERNET AND PESTERCHUM. You're rarely ever logged off of those things. Seriously, you have to get a life sooner or later. You enjoy DRAWING, BUT YOU'RE NOT VERY GOOD AT IT. You have a number of FAMILY MEMBERS, BUT YOUR GRANDMA IS THE CLOSEST TO YOU. Your room is a TOTAL FUCKING MESS YET YOU KNOW WHERE THE MAJORITY OF EVERYTHING IS. It's only big enough for two small desks, a dresser and your bed to be inside, not like you need much room anyways - your dog sleeps at the foot of your bed regardless.

== Stop procrastinating and get shit done.

HAHAHAHAHAHA- OH.. You... You were serious...

== Be that mysterious kid again.

You are now that mysterious kid. Your name is LEON. You have a variety of interests, including but not limited to, ANIME, HORSEBACK RIDING, and LEARNING NEW LANGUAGES. You currently speak over ten different languages, including dead ones. Your chum handle is aspiringStar and yoU tend to idolize Calliope.

== Pester MS

AS[aspiringStar] began pestering MS[magicallyScientific]

AS: are we set Up yet?  
MS: For what?  
AS: the game.  
MS: Oh Gog. I just found out today.  
AS: wow. really?  
MS: Yes really.  
AS: ha! someone has fallen oUt of grace.  
MS: You're a creeper.  
AS: what?  
MS: Just face it. You're very creepy.  
AS: i am no sUch thing. yoU are just jealoUs.  
MS: Of what?  
AS: Of falling oUt of grace.  
MS: What the hell are you on?!  
AS: meth. bUt that's not the issUe.  
MS: Wow. Just when I started to like you even less. You know, Sara doesn't like druggies.  
AS: i was kidding.

MS: Oh, were you?  
AS: Yes. I'm serious. I was just kidding.  
MS: You're lucky I'm nice.  
AS: Urgggg  
MS: Ha!  
AS: well, since i am in the game already, i woUld like to know when i am able to meet doom.  
MS: What?!  
AS: in fact, she tells me she is my server player.  
MS: That means she'll be the last to come in, dumbfuck.  
AS: WHAT?!  
MS: Ahahahahaha! You got duped.  
AS: ...

AS[aspiringStar] ceased pestering MS[magicallyScientific]

== Bang your head

You proceed to bang your head against the desk. You should've known SP would do this. She even told you she would, but you wouldn't believe her.

== Be Amanda

You are back to Amanda! After this conversation, you spin in your chair, simply because it's fun. But because you don't have a computer desk or chair in your room you leave your laptop to go downstairs and spin in a computer chair.

== Stop lollygagging!

You can't believe you thought/heard that. Who says lollygagging anymore?

== Pester Krystal

MS[magicallyScientific] began pestering HN[hyperactiveNovelist]

MS: The douchbag of Hope is in the game.  
HN: Who?  
MS: Oh, right, you don't know him.  
MS: He's a creeper. His name's Leon. He lives in Italy and has this weird sadomasochistic fixation on samuraiPonytail.  
HN: I'll take your word for it~  
MS: Anyway, since our world is now being destroyed by meteors, we need to get into the game.  
HN: OH, CAN I GO IN?  
MS: Sure. I'd rather have you as my server than the creepy douchbag. His handle is aspiringStar.  
HN: I will see you in the game!

HN[hyperactiveNovelist] ceased pestering MS[magicallyScientific]

== Be Krystal.

You are now Krystal. Finally, you can play Sburb. You hope Amanda was kidding when she said aspiringStar was a creepy douchebag.

== Pester aspiringStar

HN[hyperactiveNovelist] began pestering AS[aspiringStar]

AS: who is this?  
HN: I'm Krystal!  
AS: i care becaUse?  
HN: samuraiPonytail asked me to play the game! She wants me to go in next.  
AS: of coUrse.  
HN: Then let's do this!

HN[hyperactiveNovelist] ceased pestering AS[aspiringStar]

== Be someone else.

You are now someone else. Your significance is not known yet, but soon, you too, will play Sburb. But for now, we'll just leave you to your Yu-Gi-Oh cards.

== Be Sara

You are now Sara again. Jegus, the other characters will feel unappreciated. But oh well.

== Pester twinArmageddons

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering TA[twinArmageddons]

SP: :P I need your help.  
TA: what ii2 iit?  
SP: Convince Eridan to pester Amanda.  
TA: why?  
SP: You will soon see, Doom buddy.  
TA: oh gog no. what are you planniing?  
SP: I'm just doing mah job. You should understand :(.  
TA: fiine. you owe me one.  
SP: Of course! ;D

TA[twinArmageddons] ceased trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

== Be Amanda.  
You are Amanda and your jaw has just hit the core of the fucking Earth.


	4. Chapter 4

=Be Eridan

You are Eridan. Against your better judgment, you have taken Feferi's advice and began to troll some human.

== Troll MS

CA[caligulasAquarium] began trolling MS[magicallyScientific]

CA: my dear friend feferi has asked i troll you.  
MS: OMFG.  
CA: wwhat?  
MS: HOLY SHIT I MUST BE HIGH OR SOMETHING. SOME SNEAKY BASTARD SLIPPED SOMETHING IN MY DRINK/FOOD.  
CA: this wwas a stupid idea.

CA[caligulasAquarium] ceased trolling MS[magicallyScientific]

= = Be Amanda

You are staring at your screen in utter shock. What just happened was SCIENTIFICALLY IMMPOSSIBLE HE'S IN A UNIVERSE THAT DOESN'T EXIST HOW DID YOU JUST GET A MESSAGE FROM HIM

= = Question science

That was an a crazy thought that will NOT be tolerated You must get down to the bottom of this immediately!

= = this isn't a good idea

FOR SCIENCE

MS [magicallyScientific] began pestering CA [caligulasAquarium]

MS: explain yourself, you are not supposed to exist

CA: howw do i knoww you don't exist? it'd be just like that damned sollux to fake something like this

MS: cause i simply am i know i exist and I know you don't, you are a fictional character

CA: if i don't exist, howw are you talking to me? huh? explain that lowwblooded human.

MS: okay first of all, all humans have the same color blood so if that was an insult you failed. Secondly i asked first

CA: you should all die then. look, let's just agree we both exist. i didn't evven wwant to do this in the first place.

MS: Then why did you

CA: because fef asked.

MS: that's sweet but you do know she doesn't love you

CA: yeah. wwait howw did you knoww?!

MS: Cause i'm god

MS: peasant

CA: lies. you're the peasant lowwblood.

MS: well how else do you explain how i know?

CA: sollux. he's a crafty bastard that one.

MS: I have not talked to him once

CA: wwhy should i believve that?

MS: cause i'm god and i said so

CA: then you are a false god that should die.

MS: well you can't exactly kil me over the internet

MS: So i win

MS[magicallyScientific] ceased pestering CA [caligulasAquarium]

CA: it is a false vvictory

= = Cheer loudly in victory

You refuse but you will spin in your computer chair that you have to walk all the way downstairs to get. It occurs to you that you failed to find out how he contacted you in the first place…

== Be Krystal

You are Krystal and you can't believe what your screen is saying. TA[twinArmageddons] began trolling HN[hyperactiveNovelist]

HN: /holy shit/  
HN: .. DUDE, tell me I'm not high. Please. I'll be so pissed if thus is a dream or prank.  
HN: I think I need new glasses.

HN: This*  
HN: I CANT EVEN TYPE RIGHT

TA: thii2 ii2nt a dream and ii think you might need new gla22e2  
TA: your typiing 2kiill2 2uck by the way  
HN: well fuck you too, captor.  
TA: how the hell do you know my name and 2econdly, ii'd rather fuck fii2hface  
HN: I know you because I do, hush now and let me speak.  
HN: I'm preeetty sure you know who I am, or if you don't it's Krys.  
TA: kry2? A male2 name?  
HN: shut uuup, it's short for Krystal.  
HN: BACK ON TOPIC NOW.  
HN: what do you want?

Months before the events of the present, but not by many.

TA[twinArmageddons] began trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

TA: who are you?  
SP: Hi Sollux! :DD.  
TA: how do you know who ii am?  
SP: Silly Sollux! Of course I know who you are! I'm from an alternate universe of those kids Karkat wants to troll.  
TA: why diid your handle pop up? you diidn't answer my que2tiion.  
SP: Maybe a future version of myself sent it? Haha, that bitch. My name is Sara. In my universe, your universe is fictional. Just the random musings of a beautiful being.  
TA: ii am not liikely two beliieve that rubbii2h.  
SP: Meh. My biggest question is how I'm even communicating with you if I'm from a universe where you don't exist.  
TA: my technology ii2 far 2uperiior to your2. of cour2e ii can contact you any tiime ii want.  
SP: Cool~!  
TA: ye2 ii am cool.  
SP: Hai hai~~~! Sugoi, Sollux-chan!  
TA: what the hell wa2 that?  
SP: Sorry. Random Japanese. I'm so sorry TT~TT  
TA: uh, don't cry?  
SP: OK! :DD.  
TA: you are fuckiing weiird.  
SP: Thank you.  
TA: iit wa2nt a compliiment.  
SP: Like I care. I take it as a compliment.  
SP: It's all how you perceive things Sollux-chan~!  
TA: riight.  
SP: Haha, so is Karkat epically trolling John yet or not?  
TA: how do you know?  
SP: I told you dear Sollux.  
SP: You are from a fictional universe.  
TA: let2 2ay ii beliieve you for now.  
SP: Yay! Well anyway, I'm assuming my future self wanted you to upgrade my Pesterchum so I can talk to her in the future.  
TA: that ii2 too ea2y  
SP: So will you do it?  
TA: no  
SP: TT~TT I'm sorry. It's because I'm terrible aren't I? I'm the lowest of the low. This life is too cruel.  
TA: whoa, don't kiill your2elf. ii wiill upgrade iit for you 2o ju2t keep liiviing.  
SP: Really?  
TA: 2ure  
SP: Thank you! I am loving you so much right now~!  
TA: w-what?  
SP: I. Am. Loving. You. So. Much. Right. Now. Wanna. Be. Moirails?  
TA: ii've been talkiing to you for not even five minute2. and yet, you want to enter a relatiion2hiip you know nothiing about?  
SP: Sure! We can be Doom buddies! :DD.  
TA: ...why the fuck not?

TA[twinArmageddons] ceased trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

== Be Leon  
You did as the lovely Sara asked and prototyped the kernel sprite with a supposed magical ring said to summon hell fires. But since she assured you magic wasn't real, you feel a bit better about it.

== Examine the little black people  
You give them an inquisitive look. They appear to be hostile. Good thing you have your trusty sword with you.

== Slice those fuckers in half!  
Without hesitation, you begin to slash left and right. They don't stand a chance against you.

== Consult with the kernel sprite  
Your dear cat Sebastian had been cruelly tossed into the sprite after the first prototype. His glorious dark fur had changed to a hideous piss yellow.

Spritelog:

Sebastiansprite: Merow!  
AS: oh my poor kitty!  
Sebastiansprite: Leon!  
AS: i'm sorry dear. it's my fault. tell me, what should i do?  
Sebastiansprite: Sometimes what you should do isn't always what others would do.  
AS: so do i keep killing stuff?  
Sebastiansprite: Pretty much yeah.

== Kill those black bastards.  
Even if they have soft fur and cute fuzzy ears, you must do this. For Narnia.

== We're done here  
You don't waste any time in switching to another person. Who will you be?

You cannot be Sara. Pick another one


	5. Chapter 5

== be hyperactiveNovelist  
You are now Hazlett once more. Honestly, would you be anyone else? All this makes your head dizzy.

== groan and fling yourself on the bed.

Oh god how you'd love to do that, but you have shit to do. Important shit.. Like pestering the creep your friend was talking about.

== Krys, pester creep.

- hyperactiveNovelist [HN] began pestering aspiringStar [AS] -

HN: Hello again, as.  
HN: or should I say ass?

AS: i can't talk.  
HN: Too bad.  
AS: it's a matter of life or death.  
AS: hUrry it Up then.  
HN: Get me into the game? What's going on.  
AS: i'll explain later. yoU've downloaded the server/client yes?  
HN: uhhh  
AS: fUck. hold on.

AS[aspiringStar] ceased pestering HN[hyperactiveNovelist]

== Shit  
You realize you never got your copy of Sburb. You wonder idly if Amanda got her copy.

== Respond to trolling

TA[twinArmageddons] began trolling HN[hyperactiveNovelist]

TA: the douchbag human ha2 iinformed me that you don't have your copy of the game.  
HN: You are a fucking liiiifesaber man  
HN: *liiiifesaver  
TA: ii know. sara diidnt have her copy eiither.  
HN: Huh.  
TA: ii'm sendiing iit to you now.

TA[twinArmageddons] ceased trolling HN[hyperactiveNovelist

== Yes!

hyperactiveNovelist [HN] began pestering aspiringStar [AS] -

HN: Got it.  
AS: good. is it installed?  
HN: yep~  
AS: i will now deploy yoUr shit.  
HN: Don't break anythang fucker.

hyperactiveNovelist [HN] ceased pestering aspiringStar [AS] -

= = THUMP!

- hyperactiveNovelist [HN] began pestering aspiringStar [AS] -

HN: The /fuck/ did you just break?!  
HN: grr, I'm gonna go investigate, don't fuck anything else up,

- hyperactiveNovelist [HN] ceased pestering aspiringStar [AS] -

== Go investigate the thump

You go investigate the noise, finding you dog growling and barking at the front door. You try to get Buddy back inside the fucking house but the douche runs outside and away. You sigh and glare at the gapping hole in the front of your house.  
Your parents are going to kill you.  
At least youre home alone and that means nothing bad can come of thus right now right?

==

Hahahahaha you have never been so wrong in your life. For advice, you pester Sollux. Why? Because you can.

- hyperactiveNovelist [HN] began pestering twinArmageddons [ TA ]

HN: Captor, I need your help bro  
TA: why should ii help you?  
HN: I know your secret.  
TA: FUCK. fiine.  
TA: what ii2 iit?  
HN: There's a hole. In my house. Help me fix it.  
TA: you're enteriing the game. the hole ii2 iin2iigniifiicant. are we done now?  
HN: Hmmm...haha nope! :P  
TA: ii hate you.  
HN: Aw don't say that man!  
TA: iit2 true. bye.

-hyperactiveNovelist[HN] was blocked by twinArmageddons[TA]

HN: fuuuuuck.

== pester your other friend Amanda.  
You decide to pester your friend Amanda,for both serious and silly reasons.

- hyperactiveNovelist [HN] began pestering magicallyScientific [MS] -  
HN: hey, hey, listen amanda.  
HN: I NEED TROLL-BOY ADVICE.

MS: what happened?

HN: I asked Sol for help but ended up annoying him instead and now he's mad at me :\

MS: that sucks

HN: What should I doooooo?

MS: I got this don't worry, help me enter the game and I'll fix it ^.^ k?

HN: thanx c:

HN: okay, I got some things set up, and looked-over lalonde's walk-through guide thing. I can send it to you if you want.

MS: cool...i don't actually have a copy of the game tho

HN: Captor* can't even spell his name right without freaking out.

HN: if you talk to cap toe I think he can get you one.  
HN: OR, you could ask sp. She's got one.

MS: thanks brb

MS [magicallyScientific] ceased pestering HN[hyperactiveNovelist]

= = Pester Sara

MS [magicallyScientific] began pestering SP [samuraiPonytail]

MS: dude tell captor to message me asap it's life or death

SP: Sure. But why?

MS: life or death...did you not read the sentence

SP: I did. I'm kind of in a bind myself.

MS: the sooner my problems fixed the sooner i can get you in the game

SP: Ok, ok, I'll do it. Did he block you or something.

MS: my computer doesn't allow me to communicate with beings that don't exist unless they message me first

SP: Damn, forgot to send you the upgraded Pesterchum. Mou. I'll go talk to Sol right now.  
SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering MS[magicallyScientfic]

= = Check out new Pesterchum upgrade

TA[twinArmageddons] began trolling MS[magicallyScientific]

TA: what ii2 iit, human ii liike sliightly more than HN?

MS: how can you like me better we have yet to talk?

TA: that2 the poiint.

MS: rude

TA: who 2aiid ii had two be poliite?

MS: you don't but it's nicer to be polite

TA: what ii2 iit that you wanted? ii sent the upgrade already

MS: I need two things first i need a copy of Sburb

TA: and the other?

TA: ii am sendiing iit a2 we 2peak,

MS: okay and the other thing i wanted to talk to you about is WHAT THE FUCKING HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU do you know how upset krystal is right now?!

TA: ? iim not 2ure iim followiing.

MS: for someone that's so smart you can be an idiot, SHE LIKES you and you told her you hate her

TA: ii don't know her

MS: dude she asked you for help you told her you hated her than blocked her

MS: even if you don't know her that's not how you make a good impression

TA: ii admiit iit wa2 not the be2t way. to conver2e wiith 2omeone. but iit ii2 how ii conver2e wiith other2

MS: well not everyone on earth is used to rudeness and hostility for no reason

TA: on alterniia. iit ii2 how we are raii2ed. you 2hould be aware.

MS: dude i know i read the story but krystal was trying to be friends

TA: ii feel a2 iif you are tryiing to guiilt triip me.

MS: congratulations on figuring it out

TA: you are riight. ii am the lowest of the low. ii do not de2erve to liive. ii 2hould leave.

TA[twinArmageddons] ceased trolling MS[magicallyScientific]

MS: dude i didn't mean to kill yourself gog

TA[twinArmageddons] is no longer on

MS: thank you computer for stating the obvious

The computer does not appreciate the sarcasm of MS[magicallyScientific]

MS: Now your talking to me too? *sigh* this is going to be a looong day

The computer agrees with MS[magicallyScientific]

= = enough of this foolishness download the game and get Sara started

You know you could say please

= = Just do your job

You download the game and pester Sara

== Sara, don't panic!  
You can't remember how, or why, but you were being held hostage by some grubby looking thugs.

== Pester AS

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering AS[aspiringStar]

SP: Leon? Leon! I need help!  
AS: what is it?  
SP: There are creepers in my house!  
AS: WHAT?!  
SP: Has Amanda been connected?  
SP: I DON'T FuCKIN KNOW.  
SP: Fuuuuuuck :'(  
AS: Hold on, I'm being pestered.

AS[aspiringStar] ceased pestering SP[samuraiPonytail]

== AS, respond to pester.  
You proceed to have this conversation. You deploy all the weird things in the girl's house while petting Sebastiansprite.

== Sebastiansprite, purr  
Of course you're going to purr. Your master is petting you.

== Leon, flip your shit  
You do as the little arrows say. The little arrows are god. You can't defy them. EVER.

== Be Sara!  
Whelp, you're royally fucked. Oh if only Inuyasha was here. He'd knock those damned thugs out in a heartbeat.

== Sara, try to wiggle out of the bindings.  
You try and fail to remove the ropes. They're too tight. You don't even want to know how you are able to type on your iPod. Maybe all that yoga was good for you.

== Sara, wait patiently.  
Yeah, you don't think that will go over to well. One of the thugs is eyeing you creepily.

== Inch away slowly  
The thug comes over. He says he doesn't like long hair. He takes out a knife. Your heart skips a beat.

== Scream!  
You keen loudly as the hair you were so proud of is lopped off heartlessly. Only the few strands loose from your ponytail are safe, but not for long.

== Cry shamelessly  
You start to cry. Sure, it seems stupid to cry over hair but it was your pride and joy.

== Thugs, feel guilty  
You are now the thugs robbing this girl blind. You all feel guilty over one of the member's heartless chopping.

== Console hostage  
You select your most non-threatening member to console the maiden.

== Sara, continue to sob  
You keep sobbing. Even the cute guy isn't helping. He offers to make it look prettier. You sorely wish your parents had gotten that frying pan you asked for.

== Sara, take the offer  
You tell the cute thug that sure, you'll allow him to further decimate your precious hair. He tells you he's not actually a thug but a hairdresser.

== Cute thug, cut hair  
You make sure to give the hostage a pretty hairdo. You spike it gently in the back, giving it a Sakura Haruno feel. God you love Naruto so much.

== Sara, stop being such a baby!  
You can't help it! The bastard fucking cut off your pride and joy! Now he made you look like Sakura! He offers to dye your hair pink and if looks could kill, Lord English would be on this guy's ass.

== Sara, behave!  
You kindly ask the thug even he had black dye and he confirms it. You ask if he'll dye it and he says sure.

== Take a step back  
As you are getting your hair dyed, you realize Eridan is trolling you. Damn, you wished it was Karkat or someone else.

== SP, ignore CA  
You ignore the bastard without a single thought. You never really liked him much.

== Sara, pester Nepeta.  
Dear, sweet Nepeta. It's a shame she died.

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering AC[arsenicCatnip]  
SP: *the bound human trudged forward into the cave, barely enough light to see where she was walking*  
AC: :33 *ac saunters forward, tailing wagging as she lowers to pounce*  
SP: *suddenly, SP comes upon a small opening in the cave. Light trickles in*  
AC: :33 *ac pounces on the unsuspecting human.*  
AC: :33 *ac asks why the human has come into her cave*  
SP: *the human answers:  
SP: "I'm sorry! Some bad men threw me in here to be eaten by the beast of the cave."*  
AC: :33 *ac licks the human and says she likes the human so she won't eat her*  
SP: *the human breathes a sigh of relief. She tells the cat that she is being held hostage right now.*  
AC: :33 Oh no! That's terrible!  
SP: I know :'(. T-they even cut off my hair and are dying it black TT~TT.  
AC: :33 If I efur s33 them, I'll cull them!  
SP: Aw~ You're such a sweetie. I wish I could hug you :'(  
AC: :33 Me too.  
SP: I'm being pestered by Amanda. I'll talk to you later, sweetie!  
AC: :33 *ac licks the human's face again*

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering AC[arsenicCatnip]

== Hey look!  
Amanda is pestering you. You proceed to have this conversation.

== Bother your moirail

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering TA[twinArmageddons]  
SP: Amanda needs the upgraded Pesterchum. Also, she needs to talk to you about something?  
TA: what ii2 iit?  
SP: I don't know. 'Its a matter of life and death.'  
TA: fiine. by the way, ii can now 2ee you. what the FUCK ii2 happeniing?!  
SP: I'm fine :P. Though I need my trusty frying pan. :'( Can you send me a code for one? Oooh, and give it a bunch of cool shiz.  
TA: what2 a fryiing pan?  
SP: Google it :P Or whatever the troll equivalent is.  
TA: 2ure. ii can fiind iit.  
SP: Hehe, thank you darling~!

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering TA[twinArmageddons]

== Be someone else  
You're Leon. Since you've been here for a while, you've collected a shitload of grist. You're boring though, so let's go to a troll.

== Be Sollux  
You are now Sollux. You are stewing in a pot of guilt and self-degrading due to this conversation. At times like this, it's best to try to focus on something else, but you can't seem to.

== Sollux, troll SP  
TA[twinArmageddons] began trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]  
TA: 2ara?

SP: Yo. What's wrong?  
TA: ii am feeliing guiilty.  
SP: Oh. Well, talk it out~. It's why I'm your moirail.  
TA: yeah. we are aliike even though our race2 are diiviided.  
SP: XD. So~? Talk to mama bear!  
TA: ii have up2et the human known a2 HN.  
SP: Krystal? Oh. What'd you say?  
TA: that ii hated her.  
TA: and ii blocked her.  
SP: Wow man. Wow.  
SP: I'm sorry to hear that.  
SP: If I could, I would do a little shoosh pap action ;D.  
TA: thank you. you have made me feel better. ii admiit that our moiiraiilshiip may not be a2 shallow a2 ii once beliieved.  
SP: Aw~~~! You're welcome! XD. It makes me happy to hear that.  
TA: ii may con2iider apologiiziing.  
SP: Good job! *cyber huggle*  
TA: ii reciiprocate your 'cyber huggle'  
TA[twinArmageddons] ceased trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]


	6. Chapter 6

== Be Krys

Who the fuck is Krys? Oh, wait, that's you. You commonly go by Krys among friends since Krystal doesnt really suit you IRL.

== Stop fucking around and get your damn dog back inside the house.

Ha, you are not fucking around. You are currently trying to lure your dumb dog back inside the house with dog treats.  
It's a wonder he hasn't gotten hit yet, god. You watch as he scampers about in untouched snow like a dofuss and rolls about.  
God that looks like fun.

== Join your dog in making snow pups.

You'd love to do that, but currently you're getting pestered by someone who you thought blocked you.

== Krystal, answer the troll.

You answer the troll like the voice in your head tells you to - you have decided to name it Jimmeny Cricket because, well, it just sounds cool.  
Your conversation goes something like this

TA[twinArmageddons] unblocked HN[hyperactiveNovelist]  
TAtwinArmageddons] began trolling HN[hyperactiveNovelist]

TA: hello, 'krys'  
HN: OMG  
TA: ii would ju2t liike to apologiize for my actiions earliier. the amanda human ha2 iinformed me that ii wa2 rude.  
HN: Reeeally?  
TA: ye2.  
HN: Really really?  
TA: ye2 really really.  
TA: 2eiing a2 my job ii2 now done, ii wiill be leaviing.  
HN: WAIT!

TA: what ii2 IIT  
HN: sorry for being annoying earlier..  
HN: I just got really excited is all, cool stuff like this normally doesn't happen to me  
TA: what do you mean?  
TA: and ii gue22 iit2 okay  
HN: heh, thanks Captor!  
HN: Just, stuff like this in - oh my fuck  
TA: what?  
HN: FUCKING IMPS TOOK MY DOG.  
HN: I'll be back.  
HN: Wish me luck getting Buddy back!~3

hyperactiveNovelist [HN] ceased pestering twinArmaggedons[TA

== Sara, despair  
Even though you're happy about Sollux, it still doesn't mask your sadness. You seriously loved your hair. You wanted it to be exactly like Inuyasha's.

== Thugs, repent  
Suddenly, your bathtub is flying through the air. It tackles the group of thugs, clearing the space for a Cruxtuder.

== Ropes, come undone!  
An invisible force breaks the ropes on your wrists. You cheer in victory.

CG[carcinoGeneticist] began trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]  
CG: OK, I REALIZE WHAT I SAID LAST TIME WAS PRETTY DOUCHY.  
CG: I JUST WANT TO APOLOGIZE? I GUESS  
SP: The fuck you talking bout Kar?  
CG: FUCK. I WENT TO THE PAST DIDN'T I?  
SP: Yep. Looks like it. The last time we talked was...eh, a week ago? You really should just stay linear like Sol.  
CG: I WILL IGNORE THAT. BECAUSE IM TRYING TO BE FUCKING SENSITIVE HERE.  
SP: Sensitive? Dude, you're not even talking to the present self you pissed off. So what'd you do?  
CG: YOU WILL FIND OUT IN TIME.  
SP: Eh, I guess I will. Well, I won't worry about it now. But if you really want to apologize get her/me chocolate. We love the stuff~!  
CG: I WILL CONSIDER IT.

CG[carcinoGeneticist] ceased trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

== Let's see what the douchebag is up to  
You return to Leon. Surprisingly, his planet, the Land of Summer and Swords, is free of imps. He has alchemized a shit load of new items, including a new broadsword that reminds one of a Claymore.

== AS pester SP

AS[aspiringStar] began pestering SP[samuraiPonytail]

AS: i trUst all is well?  
SP: Yerp! Amanda epically saved me with a bathtub. God that joke is way overused.  
AS: what joke?  
SP: Oh right, you've never read Homestuck.  
AS: no. what is this homestUck?  
SP: It's a web comic by Andrew Hussie about four kids playing a game-this same game-that ends the world.  
AS: how is it that we are playing this same game?  
SP: Eh, the universe is a fucking frog. It's too stupid to realize this universe is off limits to Skaia.  
AS: i see. as long as yoU are well, i do not care.  
SP: That's sweet. Anyway, how far have you gotten? I hope you haven't tried to kill the denizen.  
AS: denizen?  
SP: It's kind of like a boss I guess. Or you could think of it as the top of the food chain for your planet's monsters. There are two options you can take. One, you can kill the denizen and gain all it's riches or two, you can listen to it. Listening to the denizen would be highly recommended as it can tell you things.  
AS: i will do as yoU ask. i will not harm the denizen.  
SP: I'm not telling you to go after it, and I'm not telling you to not go after it. Whatever you choose is your own fate.  
AS: i see. wise words from the Doom.  
SP: Hehe, thanks.

SP: Anyway, be careful ok?  
AS: i will. do not worry.  
SP: Thanks, oh, and try to be a little nicer to Amanda and Krystal? I realize you're a douchebag of Hope, but if they can like Eridan, I'm sure they can hate you just a smudge less.  
AS: i will attempt it.  
SP: You keep saying I will.  
AS: becaUse it is a promise.  
SP: Hehe, you're a little weird. I got to go. Alchemizing shiz up in here yo.

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering AS[aspiringStar]

== Leon, reminisce  
You remember your first conversation with SP.

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering AS[aspiringStar]  
SP: Yo.  
AS: who is this?  
SP: I'm Sara! I have been looking for you for a while now. My Doomy powers and the voices tell me you're part of an event that will doom us all! :DD.  
AS: yoU seem enthUsiastic.  
SP: I learned from a cartoon that when you see the bad things, it's better to look forward to the good things in life.  
AS: i see.  
SP: Your role is to play a game with us.  
AS: what sort of game?  
SP: A role-playing game I guess. Your title is the Mage of Hope. I am the Knight of Doom.  
AS: what does the title have to do with any of this?  
SP: Title?  
SP: It can be broken down by two things. Class and Aspect. These decided what powers you get. Only you can discover how to use them. I'm not too sure on the exact details of what you can do, but it's theorized that Hope players can directly affect reality. Like with Eridan. He believed in science. His wand became scientific and became even stronger than a supposed "god" weapon. All because he had hope :)  
AS: i see. this aspect seems dangeroUs to those who woUld Use it for selfish pUrposes.  
SP: Indeed, it does.  
AS: what aboUt the class? why are yoU a Knight and i a Mage?  
SP: Skaia's goal is not only to create a new universe, but to allow it's players to grow and learn. The class of Knight is described as "warriors who exploit their aspect as a weapon." I'm not too sure on how Skaia chooses it's aspects and classes. It just does. Skaia rarely ever moves. It's the Horrorterrors you have to look out for. One move from them and blam! Your entire plan is sabotaged.  
AS: what?  
SP: Oops! I wasn't supposed to say that. But it seems fun to give out Doom prophecies. Ooooh, I know a way to make a quick buck! ;)  
AS: i feel as if i shoUld be concerned.  
SP: You probably should :P. I may or may not be dooming lots of people. Meh. A little forewarning can't hurt, can it?  
AS: i advise yoU to not do what i think yoU are.  
SP: I'll think about it. It was nice talking to you, oh Mage of Hope.

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering AS[aspiringStar]

AS: i think im in love, mother!

== Leon, shake your head  
Now is not the time to remember! Now it is time to act!

== Look up  
Your house has really grown. Thanks to the building expertise of SP, it now reaches the heavens.

== What's that?  
What seems to be a blue logo sits in the sky. It's color is faded, but then it lights up. That signals the next player has entered. But it's not like you know that.

== Have some tea  
You can't help it. It's an addiction. Tea time must happen!

== Be someone else.  
While Leon has tea, let's go back to our Doom friend.

== Sara, respond to memo.

CSP[currentsamuraiPonytail] posted on the Memo [Sara's Plans!] at 10:30 hours.

CSP: Psst! Past me!

PSP[pastSamuraiPonytail] posted on the Memo [Sara's Plans!] at 9:30 hours.

PSP: What?  
CSP: As I'm sure you're aware, you have no idea what AlphaBeta means.  
PSP: Yeah, what's up with me not telling myself our plans?  
CSP: She works in mysterious Doomy ways.  
PSP: Did that event really change her that much?  
CSP: Apparently :P. Fucking Horrorterrors.  
PSP: I know right! Gog they suck!  
CSP: Well, they are trying save their own skins.  
PSP: I realize that, but they could've just asked before they did that.  
CSP: What's done is done. Anyway! AlphaBeta maneuvers consist of contacting you know who.  
PSP: Oh. That guy. Gog he is such a tool.  
CSP: Well yeah, he's assisting us in our epic plan :D.  
PSP: But ultimately in the end, he'll have been using us the entire time.  
CSP: Not exactly :). In an hour, you'll know everything. It kind of sucks being the orchestrater of Doom. You know how we're all going to die ;(  
PSP: Yeah. Not to mention the whole blind thing.  
CSP: Yeah. I wonder, do we have two dream selves?  
PSP: You're the future version of me. Shouldn't you know this already?  
CSP: I do. I'm just trying to find something good in all of this.  
PSP: You'll be able to meet Sollux face to face?  
CSP: True! Oh, hey, I just remembered I had to do something concerning the trolls.  
PSP: You don't want to forget that. It's imperative to our plan.  
CSP: Yerp. So you just contact him and I'll go do what I need to do.

CSP[currentsamuraiPonytail] logged out of memo at 10:31 hours.

PSP: Will all of this really keep us from being doomed?

FSP[futuresamuraiPonytail] responded to memo [Sara's Plans!] at 1800 hours.

FSP: That is for you to decide.

FSP[futuresamuraiPonytail] logged out of memo [Sara's Plans!] at 1800 hours.  
PSP[pastsamuraiPonytail] logged out of memo [Sara's Plans!] at 9:31 hours.

== Be Amanda  
You are now Amanda, and you have just saved your friend's life. Though you didn't know it, she was being held hostage by robbers.

== epically save her with a bathtub!  
You toss her bathtub at the thugs. It's super effective.

== Pester Sara  
You can't pester her, she's typing furiously on her iPod already.

== Get pestered by Sara  
Oh for the love of-

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering MS[magicallyScientific]

SP: Thank you!  
MS: WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME THERE WERE ROBBERS IN YOUR FUCKING HOUSE?!  
SP:...I didn't want to worry you?  
MS: IM GOING TO BOIL YOU IN ACID.  
MS: AND WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOUR HAIR?!  
SP: I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering MS[magicallyScientific]

== Stare  
You stare as your friend falls asleep, right in the middle of the floor.

== Facepalm combo x1  
You face palm. It is epic. Or at least you'd like to think so.


	7. Chapter 7

= = Do something

You decide your not going to go through step by step what was happening on your half while you were rescuing Sara cause let's face it that would be redundant and NOTHING has happened since you entered the game. Krystal is an amazing friend and all but she hasn't been that great game wise I mean she hasn't deployed anything you are just sitting here waiting

= = Pester Krystal

Actually that's the best idea you've heard all day

MS [magicallyScientific] began pestering HN [hyperactiveNovelist]

MS: krystallllllllllllllllllll youuuuuuuuuu thereeeeeeeee

MS: hello

MS: just sitting here doing nothing

MS: whatever message me or deploy some stuff. Do something

MS [magicallyScientific] ceased pestering HN [hyperactiveNovelist]

= = Do something else

You stare at Sara still asleep on your computer screen. You figure now is a good of time as any to start deploying stuff in her house but first your going to need some room. You try to rearrange her living room but take out a wall instead. Well you still need room so you just throw all her furniture on the lawn and plop down the cruxtruder and the alchemizer, You feel like you're forgetting something else…..Sara can just tell you what she's missing when she wakes up it'll be fine.

= = Pester Krystal again

Nah, You'll just wait for her to message back. Maybe you'll take a nap

= = Did I say to go to sleep!

You are to busy sleeping to come up with a sarcastic reply

== Wake up!  
You wake up. Your room is the familiar shade of PURPLE. Congrats, you're a Dersite dreamer!

== Look outside  
You look outside. The darkness of the Void is vast.

==  
You look at the walls of your room. A hauntingly familiar word is scrawled in an yellow.

== D00M  
You recognize it as part of a code. Oh Gog.

== Flip your shit  
You do so.

== Wander outside.  
You hop out of the tower, landing safely on the ground.

== Abscond!  
A group of black carapaces points at you and rushes at you with spears pointed upward. Quickly, you abscond.

== Bump into Jack  
You collide with Jack Noir. He growls and jabs at you with his knife. You scramble away.

== Be Jack  
You are now Jack. You have just been knocked down by a little teenage girl. You follow her in order to stab her for knocking you down.

== Follow teenage girl!  
Quickly now.

== Be Sara  
You are now absconding from a stab happy Jack Noir and a group of carapaces.

== Hide in the alleyway!  
You dart sideways. The group rushes past you.

== Silence!  
Suddenly, a hand covers your mouth. You struggle relentlessly.

== Get fed up  
Your captor has gotten fed up and drags you further into the alley.

== Sara, wake up!  
You somehow wake up, back in your house.

== Sara, pester Amanda  
SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering MS[magicallyScientific]

SP: Amanda!  
MS: Finally! I've been sitting here like a creeper watching you sleep.  
SP: Hehe, sorry :P  
SP: Anyway, did you deploy all the shiz?  
MS: About that...  
MS: I forgot something? I deployed the cruxtruder and alchemiter.  
SP: What about the totem lathe?  
MS: !  
SP: And the pre-punched card?  
MS: !  
MS: I'm face palming. I seem to be doing that a lot lately.  
SP: Hehe. So I'll just try to start with what I have.  
MS: You do that. I'll be over here. Deploying stuff like crazy.  
SP: Thankies :D.  
MS: Sure.

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering MS[magicallyScientific]

== Do shiz  
You go do shiz. Like mess around with the alchemiter. You can't seem to recall what it's for exactly. Oh well, Amanda will tell you something.

== Be Amanda  
You are now Amanda.

= = Wake up!

How can anybody get any sleep around here with these annoying voices, you might as well check and see if Sara has woke up. Oh she has and she's pestering you.

= = Answer her

You do and you proceed to have this conversation

= = Get busy deploying stuff

You deploy the totem lathe and the pre-punched cards, there now maybe you can finally get started too.

= = Pester Krys so you can get some stuff done

MS[magicallyScientific] began pestering HN [hyperactiveNovelist]

MS: you there this time?

HN: omg sorry about that! I had to rescue my dog

MS: nah it's all cool if my puppy went mia I would be all over that and worry about this crazy game latter too

HN: Thanx

MS: no prob but it would be spectacular if you could deploy some stuff in my house not that sitting here doing nothing isn't a ton of fun

HN: ! Of course, how could I forget

MS: it's fine, just you know get it done please

MS[magicallyScientific] ceased pestering HN[hyperactiveNovelist]

= = Listen in horror as the lower levels of your house get destroyed

The noises are over but you're afraid to see what your friend did to your house

= = Investigate

Well you're going to have to use the machines anyway might as well see what they've destroyed

= = Faint

No, the damage to your living room and kitchen is horrendous but this situation does not require fainting, mainly because if you were to faint you would hit your head on one of the smashed pieces of furniture. How could four objects cause such a mess, the wall between your kitchen and living room is nonexistent, your fridge has crushed your t.v, your couches are scattered in pieces all over the living room, and your stove has been crushed by the alchemizer.

= = Alchemize some stuff already

You would love to but you're being pestered by some D-bag of hope

CA[caligulasAquarium] began trolling MS[magicallyScientific]

CA: human

CA: it has come to my attention

MS: troll

MS: wow way to mess up my reply

CA: you messed wwith me

MS: sorry?

CA: you should be

MS: why am i apologizing again? not that i don't know i just want to make sure you know

CA: because you are a lowwly human. and i am a high blooded seadwweller

MS: i see or should i say sea? anyways i was in the middle of somefin so what did you want?

CA: it has come to my attention that youre cohort has been contacting fef

MS: what about it?

CA: order her to stop.

CA: she puts ideas in fef's head

MS: no

CA: wwhat?!

MS: you heard me

MS:N

MS:O

CA: wwhy not?! as a landdwweller you should be proud that i am taking the time to contact you.

MS: well 1. like i care about the fact that you live in the ocean and i don't 2. i will not do something i think is wrong, my friends can be friends with people you know and there is nothfin you can do about it

CA: hmp! i wwill havve better luck wwith the other one it seems

MS: hahahahahahahahahahaha good luck

CA: i don't need your luck

MS: you totally do

CA: do not

MS: doooo tooooo

CA: do not

MS: DO

CA: do

CA: not

MS: fine i don't want you to have my luck anyways its all mine

CA: i didn't want your luck. nevver did and nevver whale

MS: you'll totally wish you had my luck cause its awesome but you'l never ever have it and my friend will keep talking to fef and filling her head with amazing ideas

CA: nevver!  
CA[caligulasAquarium] ceased trolling MS[magicallyScientific]

MS: you're jealous :p

= = Enough of this alchemize stuff

You never get a break oh wait shouldn't you prototype your kernel sprite :\

= = Prototype your kernel sprite

Didn't I just think that?

= = Nooooooooo

Okay then, you need to figure out what you should prototype first and you should probably think of it fast. Krystal had activated it when she placed it so now it was counting down and you wasted a good 5 minutes with observing your house and talking to Eridan. Well having read homestuck you know nothing is going to be left of your house so you should probably save your dog but you need to prototype something else too…YOU CAN PROTOTYPE A BOOK….but which one?

= = Just hurry up!

Fine you don't have to be so pushy, you know you'll prototype some Leo Tolstoy you have Anna Karenina lying on your bed

= = Run upstairs

You take the stairs two at a time and rush into your room

= = Grab Anna Karenina

You grab Anna Karenina and rush back down stairs

= = Prototype Anna Karenina

You chuck the massive story into the kernel sprite

= = Stare at giant floating book

You were expecting something different….but it's just a giant floating book…well you should probably throw your dog into it too…

= = Go look for dog

You go up to your parents bedroom he's probably sleeping under their bed

= = Open bedroom door

You open the door and look in, it's all clear you shuffle in and call out your dog's name

= = look under bed for dog

You get on all fours and search under the bed for your best friend Logan, you spot him sleeping peacefully

= = Grab dog

You hate to wake him but you got to save him for doom, you grab your sweet little baby and run down the stair case it's a good thing he's small enough to carry

= = Now prototype dog

You place your dog in the creepy floating book

= = Stare in amazement

Your dog is now a thousand times cuter, he has a hat that's really an open book and he has little scholarly glasses. It's just so adorable.

= = Talk to Logansprite

Spritelog:

Logansprite: Woof!

MS: LOGAN! YOU'RE JUST SO ADORABLE

Logansprite: Now is not the time for pleasantries my dearest owner you must proceed to alchemize some items so you will be properly equipped for enemy attacks.

MS:…you can….talk?

Logansprite: But of course you did prototype me with a high quality novel, did you expect me to be illiterate?

MS: actually yes

Logansprite: Your honesty is appreciated but you must alchemize at once

MS: ok

= = Try not to dwell on the fact your dog can talk

You're not sure if you should go with it or start freaking out…but what Logan said was the most rational thing you should get alchemizing before some imps show up.

= = Alchemize

You would sit there and list all the objects you alchemized and how you went about doing it but that would take much to long so instead you'll just say what you made. You now have to computers your amazing computer bag it's stylish and serves a purpose ((being a computer)) your glasses also now function as a computer which is cool. You didn't upgrade your outfit cause you like your jeans and T-shirt and there isn't anything in the world that would make you wear a dress. You also now have an awesome weapon, it's a combination of a lamp and a splinter of wood it's like an electric spear it's pretty awesome.

= = Go imp hunting

You've done enough you're taking a nap

= = THAT WAS NOT WHAT I SAID

Well it's what you're doing

= = Be Krystal

You are now Krystal. After talking with Amanda decide to get to business.

== Get shit done.  
You would love to, but you're scared. You were so excited about the game, but now you're worried you'll fuck up and mess something important up, and, and  
Oh shit you're crying.

== Cling to beloved memorabilia of close friend.  
You do as Jimmeny tells you and cling to your plush black sheep, Ange. The sheep was given to you twice so far. Once from your deceased friend, and second by your friend Angela whom you've named the sheep after. Ange is so soft and understanding, she let's you cry your eyes out into her tummy and you imagine she's rubbing your back.

== suck it up enough to get an idea.

You suck it up. Hazlett's don't cry. You still have Ange in your arms as you walk back over to your tablet to check on your friends. So far no ones pestered you after your chat with Amanda. You get an idea and take your lovable plush to gently chuck at your kernel sprite.

== What...

What the fuck? All that happened is Ange is a floating sheep that occasionally licks your face and cuddles you.  
Okay then...

== Prototype again.

You prototype again - this time with your cat Teardrop seeing as Buddy is nowhere to be found. What you get is pretty fucking awesome.

== Meet your new sprite.

You'd love to, but someone's pestering you. You'll have to come back to your catsheep later.

== Who is it?  
Oh, well fuck. It's fishdouche- yay. Just when the headache starts to settle down.. You are so not in the mood for this shit.

caligousAquarium [CA] began trolling hyperactiveNovelist [HN]

CA: tell your friend to stop talkin wwith fef  
HN: I got shit to do, l /am not/ in the mood for it fishfucker  
CA: rude  
HN: bite me  
CA: you should feel honored I'm evven contact in a barbaric lowwlife like you, keys  
CA: honestly  
HN: I'm not barbaric yet, wait till I get my Axe and cram it up your ass  
CA; /rude/  
HN: DONT CARE  
HN: my friends can talk to whoever they want - deal with it.  
HN: secondly, I thought you and feferi weren't a legit thing anymore?  
CA: None of your business lowwblood  
CA: secondly, you should be grateful I don't cull you wwhere you stand  
CA: I can see you'vve been cryin as usual  
HN: anyone would cry if they had to look at your god awful colors, asshole  
CA: oh, an like your shade a purple's any better than mine  
HN: I am so done  
hyperactiveNovelist[HN] has blocked caligiousAquarius [CA]

==  
Holy shit that was exhausting. You decide to just face plant into your guide's belly and relax. She complies with a purr and her fluffy arms around you.


	8. Chapter 8

== Oh look  
You're back to Sara! Since you were gone, she's made a lot of progress! She got into the game, prototyping a snazzy headband and a salamander on the way. Although she was slightly concerned with that second kernel sprite...

== Got on with it!  
Sheesh. You scoff at the voices. The voices deserve to be scoffed at.

== Look, we're sorry  
Nope. You blew it.

== Fine have it your way  
That's better

==  
You wander around, equipped with your trusty frying pan. Gog damnit you love it so much. You have got to remember to send Sollux a nice present. Salaheadsprite tags along.

== Finally!  
You spot a few imps. They're weird looking but fuck, you don't really care. Need to collect some grist for that alchemiter.

== Thwack!  
You whack at the imps viciously, absently picking up the fallen grist.

== Go back  
Once you've killed enough imps, you decide to return to your house.

== Look up  
Well, Amanda was sure busy. Your house was nearly touching the gate.

== Enter  
You enter your home, imp free of course. You would've had an aneurysm if they destroyed your lovely walls.

== Pester someone!  
You decide to pester Karkat. Though you've pestered other trolls, Karkat remains in your top favorite.

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering CG[carcinoGeneticist]

SP: Karkat~  
SP: Karkat~!  
CG: WHAT.  
CG: WHAT IS IT THAT COMPELS YOU TO PESTER ME?  
SP: Aw don't be so stingy Kar!  
SP: Here I am, waiting for my imminent demise and you don't even want to take the time to talk to me?  
SP: It makes my heart bleed /3  
CG: FOR A BEING OF DOOM  
CG: YOU ARE SURPRISINGLY CHEERFUL.  
CG: IT'S CREEPING ME OUT.  
SP: I-I can change!  
SP: Please don't be creeped out :'(  
SP: TT_TT. If Karkat doesn't like me anymore, there's nothing to live for.  
CG: HOLD ON. I NEVER SAID THAT. I JUST MEANT THAT IT'S WEIRD FOR YOU TO BE SO CHEERFUL ABOUT YOUR OWN DEATH.  
SP: Oh...I'm sorry!  
CG: THIS IS WHY I DON'T LIKE TALKING TO YOU OR SOLLUX.  
CG: YOU ALWAYS DO SHIT LIKE THAT. I MEAN SERIOUSLY? LOVE YOURSELF MORE.  
SP: You shouldn't be talking :p. And this is why Sollux is my moirail.  
CG: WHAT?!  
CG: INTERSPECIES RELATIONS IS A BIG FUCKING NO.  
SP: I thought that was only for flush-crushes? It's not like we'll have some sloppy make outs or anything.  
SP: I'll leave that to Krystal ;D.  
CG: GOG NO.  
SP: So~? Talk to the human about your redrom! Personally, I ship you with Nepeta. ;D. You're both so cute~!  
CG: IM NOT TALKING ABOUT THIS WITH YOU.  
SP: Aw come on~! I promise I won't get mad at you if it's not Nepeta!  
SP: Does she like Piña Coladas? And getting caught in the rain?  
CG: WHAT THE FUCK-  
SP: Is she not into yoga? Does she have half a brain?  
CG: SHUT UP.  
SP: Does she like making love at midnight~ in the dunes of the cape? Is she the love that you've looked for? Write to her and escape!  
CG: IM GOING TO IGNORE THAT. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK WAS THAT?  
SP: It's a song~! Google it. It's called the 'Piña Colada' song I think. By Rupert Holmes. It's a favorite of mine~  
CG: WOW. EARTH MUSIC IS SHITTY.  
SP: Not all of it! D:  
SP:

index?&desktop_uri=%2F#/watch?v=vS1WnWjxfsk

CG: WHAT IS THAT?  
SP: "You're quite good on your feet."  
SP: "I'm even better off my feet."  
SP: It's a scene from Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me! Just watch it. You'll love it.  
CG: I MIGHT WATCH IT. IF I HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO I MEAN.  
SP: You'll watch it. I know you will.  
CG: HOW CAN YOU BE SO SURE?  
SP: I just am. It's a Doom thing xD.  
CG: THAT MADE NO SENSE.  
SP: Whelp. An imp just stole my manga :/. Bastard wants to die, doesn't he/she/it?  
CG: OH NO. WAS IT THE SHOUJO?  
SP: Nope. But every manga is important to me.  
CG: I UNDERSTAND. IT'S LIKE ME AND MY REDROM NOVELS.  
SP: No one understands the significance of our romantic pursuits /3  
CG: YOU ARE RIGHT. MAYBE WE'RE NOT SO DIFFERENT.  
SP: Righty-o! I need to go save my precious babies. Bye bye, romance buddy 3

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering CG[carcinoGeneticist]

CG:...  
CG:...3

== Browse YouTube  
You scroll through YouTube. After smacking those imps with your frying pan of course.

== :DDD

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering CA[caligulasAquarium]

SP: Eridan~!  
CA: silvver tongued landdwweller  
SP: I found something you might enjoy! XD  
CA: wwhat is it?  
SP: You'll see ;D. I sent it to Fef and she absolutely loved it lol.  
CA: you need to stop talking to her.  
CA: you're dragging her dowwn a path of destruction.  
SP: Psssht. No I'm not.  
SP: By the way, Amanda would love to have a little science thing going on ;D. Trust me, I've read enough shoujo manga to know.  
CA: wwhat?  
SP: She might be up for a little moirail action~  
CA:...  
CA: wwhat did you wwish to show me?  
SP:

index?&desktop_uri=%2F#/watch?v=NPQVrjnC1jo

SP: I still hate you by the way, douchebag of hope. I hope my attitude hasn't made you forget.  
CA: and i you.  
SP: Glad to know we're on the same page.

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering CA[caligulasAquarium]

== Whew!  
Gog you hate talking to Eridan. But you have no choice. It's for the shoujo. Everything you do is for the shoujo.

== Play matchmaker  
You try and fail to get some of your friends together. Your echeladder hasn't gotten that high yet. Wait, when did you get an echeladder?

== Be Leon  
You are back to Leon. Not much has happened admittably.

== Who's there?!  
You see a strange man lurking behind a boulder.

== For Narnia!  
You charge toward him.

== Be Hussie  
You are now Hussie. After some time shenanigans involving a kid you don't know, you've ended up in the Medium.

== Lurk  
You hide behind a rock. The boy waves goodbye.

== Fuck  
You're fucked. A different boy is charging at you with a sword.

== Screech  
You're too manly for that. Instead you squeal like a little girl and high tail it out of there.

== Abscond!  
Abscond Hussie, abscond!

== Let's leave those two alone

== Be someone else.  
Choose someone else to be.

= = Be Amanda

Ugggg you're too tired to be Amanda…You've been asleep for two hours! How did that happen. You don't even remember anything just a lot of yellow, well if it's important you would have remembered right? Well you did forget to deploy two machines in Sara's house and you forgot to do all of that homework. Nah, You're sure if it was important you would have remembered.

= = Check on Sara

She seems to be doing fine but you should probably start building up her house, speaking of which why hasn't Krystal built your house up yet? Whatever you can pester her about it later.

= = Build up Sara's house

You spend the next half-hour building up her house to the portal geez why does it take so much time?

= = Pester Krystal

Well no duh what else would you do?

MS [magicallyScientific] began pestering HN [hyperactiveNovelist]

MS: yo

HN: hey c:

MS: what's up?

HN: Just kinda woke up from napping in my meowbaw's belly c:  
HN: I ALSO made up with captor, and deployed some stuff in your house!

MS: awesome! yeah i definitely noticed all the stuff you deployed

HN: Good! I was a little worried I wouldn't be able fit all that crap in there

MS: Leon

MS: but before you go off and pester him i kinda need you to do somfin for me

MS: sorry something

HN: who's suppose to be the one that sets all my stuff up?

HN: you've been hanging out with cuddle fish, haven't you? c:  
HN: by that I mean feferi  
HN: and sure. what is it?

MS: actually she hasn't messaged me once

MS: and not that im not enjoying sitting here doing nothing but i was wondering if you could start building my house up?

HN: wow, serious?  
HN: and construction underway! c:  
HN: Sorry in advanced if I 'wreck yo shit up'

MS: yay! and its al okay

MS: all* stupid keyboard

HN: tablets arent any better, but it's all right!  
HN: speakin a which, my Tab's about to die  
HN: to the chargeeer!  
HN: I'll work on your house as I charge this mofo too c:

MS: cool

MS [magicallyScientific] ceased pestering HN[ hyperactiveNovelist]

= = Listen as more of your house gets destroyed

Well you should probably stay in doors while that's going on. So what should you do now?

= = Pester Feferi

Why not?

MS[ magicallyScientific] began pestering CC[ cuttlefishCuller]

MS:yo

CC: )(ello

CC: to w)(at do i ow-E the pleasur-E?

MS: i was just bored and it seems everyone else is talking to you

MS: so why not join in

CC: w)(ale i dont mind 38D

MS: cool

CC: so

CC: is t)(er-E anyt)(ing specific i can )(elp wit)(?

MS: hmmmm why does eridan care if you talk to us?

CC: )(e's always like t)(at, glub. For glub's sake )(e doesnt get t)(at we're over.

CC: it's mostly SP anyway

CC: )(e's convinced s)(e will kill us all

MS: she probably will but she's my friend so i trust it's for the best and hopefully we don't stay dead

CC: Yes, i )(ope we dont di-E.

CC: i like )(er fis)( s)(ows 38D

MS: fish shows?

CC: yes. s)(e sent m-E a link for t)(is wonderful movie about a seadweller and a landweller finding true love.

MS: THE LITTLE MERMAID

MS: hahahahahahahahahahahaha omg you should show that to eridan i bet his face would be priceless

CC: )(e would not like it. )(e doesnt like landwellers

MS: well he should

CC: i agree. Eridan s)(ould let go of t)(e notion of )(ate. we arent better t)(an any one else just because our blood is )(ig)( on t)(e stupid caste

MS: you are a very sensible person

CC: )(e)(e t)(anks glub. SP tells me you like fis)( puns

MS: they are amazfin

CC: glub t)(ey are. 38D

MS: haha

MS: shi-

MS [magicallyScientific] ceased pestering CC[cuttlefishCuller]

= = Do something

You would mourn the loss of your beloved computer bag but you don't have time for that some very intelligent looking imps have come in through the part of your room krystal broke

= = Strife

You use your awesome electric spear and fry those monsters like there's no tomorrow

= = Collect grist

You finally finished your long battle and have been awarded a ton of grist. Woot!

= = Check Echeladder

You will not, the only title worth having is God Tier so no you will not check.

= = Work your way up to the portal

Now this is somfin you will do…something*

= = Fight off imps

Whale this is going on maybe we should be someone else….while*

= = Be someone else

== suddenly you are someone else!  
Suddenly you are someone else. Who is this someone else?

== Enter Name.  
You've already done this dumbass. You are Krystal, currently asleep on your guides belly. She doesn't object but makes an odd noise between a baw and a meow.

== Krystal, wake the fuck up.  
No, screw you. It's comfy here Jimmeny.

== I said to wake up.  
Do I have to?

== Yes, you do.  
FIIINE.

== Wake up  
You, reluctantly, wake up. Your guide licks your face and whispers to you like you always thought she would. She tells you to answer you darned tablet, and create a weapon.  
There is no way you don't jump at the chance to be all over that.  
Without going on a rant about the cool shiz you made, you've created a six-foot battle Axe - you can't help but grin. It looks so badass and awesome. You also made a couple spare computer gadgets you might need on the road, and grabbed your backpack to carry all this loot in.

== Stop messing around and answer your tab  
You stop messing around with your junk to answer - oh, look! It's Amanda! Finally some good news.  
You proceed to have / this conversation /.  
In short you need to build her house up.  
== you so totally got this  
Yes you do so totally got this. There is no way you don't.

== start building already!  
All right, all right!  
You start building amanda's house up, and soon run into trouble with grist needs.  
Well damn.

== look for the fuckers that stole your dog.  
You're pretty sure Bud's dead and gone, but you avenge him anyway with the black blood of your enemies' with your Battle Axe.  
You look so badass in your ripped jeans and black hoodie with a video controller on it. The hood is pulled over your eyes for added dramatic effect.

== Collect grists from slain enemies and continue building.  
You do as jimmeny asks of you and collect the grists in a timely fashion.

== return to building up Amanda's house  
Again, you do as he says and build the fuck out of the place. It's just high enough to reach the gate if she jumped. But that'd be bad, so you make a little ramp for her to walk up.  
Perfect.

== Get pestered by troll.  
Oh hey, you're being pestered again. Wonder who it is..


	9. Chapter 9

== Write a schpiel  
So we've seen the exploits of four kids, most of who like Homestuck. They somehow discover Sburb and one even seems to know more than she lets on. So where do the actual characters fit into all of this? Let's take a look, shall we?

== Months in the past, but not many  
A meteorite orbits space. Right now, there are 12 alien residences on said giant rock. After a whole lot of playing a special game, they hid here, in the hopes of escaping one Jack Noir.

==  
The 12 aliens, known as trolls, troll four children from a different session as theirs. No one really understands why. They just listen to their self-declared leader like good little trolls.

==  
Anyway, how do children from a completely different universe fit into this? Well, this question may never be answered, as the authoress(es)may not even know. Or maybe, just maybe, one of them has a slight inkling as to why-

== WAIT  
Oi, Oi, don't be giving out any clues! -Authoress Sara says indignantly, hitting whoever has been controlling the peoples with the arrows.

== OMG  
No, no, no. NO. No spoilers! All will be revealed in time! Mwahahahahaha! -Authoress Sara laughs maniacally.

== Okkkkkkaaaaay  
Ahem. So, let's go to the troll's side of things, shall we? -Authoress Sara gives an innocent smile while holding up her trusty frying pan. Seriously people, get one. YOU WILL NOT REGRET ET!

== Ahem, Be Sollux  
You are now Sollux Captor. Right now, you have just had a conversation with a weird human. You try to pinpoint their location, but for some reason it doesn't work.

== Sollux, fix the problem  
Aha! Your computer's wires are just a little loose. You plug everything back in and try again.

== Look at the human  
You see a blonde haired human with glasses hunched over a computer. You assume it's female, from the mid-to-lower back length hair, but then again, the Rose human doesn't have long hair.

==  
You continue to observe the human observing the computer. Quickly, you become bored.

== D00M  
You get a weird feeling in your body as the human stares at the screen, entranced.

== Flash!  
You see a green flash and suddenly, the human is holding a letter.

== Human, open letter!  
The human(you've got to stop referring to her/him/it as that) opens the letter and a dark green haze comes out.

== Reborn!  
The human's eyes glow the same green. You notice a hauntingly familiar insigna glow on her chest.

== Cha!  
Suddenly, she turns her eerie eyes and stares at you through the screen. Her grin creeps you out but you continue staring.

== Blink!  
Sara(you finally remembered her name) blinked and the creepy factor lowered.

== Be Karkat  
You are Karkat. Sollux has just informed you of another universe. You could care less. He says he met another player. That got your attention.

== Troll SP

CG[carcinoGeneticist] began trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

CG: OK WHOEVER THE FUCK YOU ARE, YOU BETTER NOT TOUCH THOSE FUCKING GAMES.  
CG: THEY WILL DESTROY YOUR PLANET.  
SP: OMG hi Karkat! :DDD.  
SP: Shit, I guess if Sollux can troll me, then you can too!  
SP: Oh Gog I think I need to sit down. Oh wait, I'm already sitting down! :DD.  
CG: HOW DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?  
SP: Oh! I'm sorry, I forgot my manners.  
SP: I'm Sara! :DD. And you, my dear Karkat, are a fictional character from a web comic called Homestuck.  
CG: PLEASE. DO I LOOK LIKE I WAS HATCHED YESTERDAY?  
SP: But it's true! Fine, here, let me prove it to you...  
SP: This should be ok..…((song from little mermaid link here))

CG: WHAT IS THAT?  
SP: Watch it and find out :PP.  
CG: FINE. HOLD ON. IM NOT DONE TROLLING YOU.

==  
You click on the link against your better judgment. For four minutes, you sit, transfixed on the flashing screen.

CG: THAT WAS...  
SP: Amazing? Yeah, I know.  
CG: AM I REALLY JUST A FIGMENT OF SOME LOSERS IMAGINATION?  
SP: Aw, don't think like that! You're as real as I am! Maybe Hussie just gets visions of your universe? That's what I like to believe anyway.  
CG: I SEE.  
SP: If I could, I would hug you~ 33. You sound like you need one anyway.  
CG: THANKS BUT NO THANKS. I DON'T NEED MORE CONFUSING ADVANCES. BESIDES INTERSPECIES RELATIONS ARE A FUCKING NO.  
SP: Chill. I'm just a huggy person. You don't have to think of it as any kind of redrom advance.  
CG: TRUE  
SP: You know, I secretly love reading a type of redrom thing. It's called shoujo manga~33  
CG: OH? ITS PROBABLY NOT AS GOOD AS MY REDROM NOVELS.  
SP: Oi, don't knock it till you try it! True, I've never read any troll romance books but you don't see me going around being all assholey about it. :PP  
CG: OK, I GUESS IM SORRY.  
SP: Thank you :DD.  
SP: So, do you ship anyone?  
CG: WHAT? NO. THATS NEPETA'S THING.  
SP: Aw. I ship all of you guys. So, so hard -/-  
CG: OH. UH, WE'RE FLATTERED I GUESS?  
SP: No no, it's cool if it creeps you out. I'm just a creepy person.  
CG: YES, YES YOU ARE.  
SP: :PP. You're just jealous.  
SP: Jealous of my creeper powers.  
SP: And my new Doomy powers.  
SP: Especially the Doomy powers ;DD  
CG: YEAH SURE LET'S GO WITH THAT.  
SP: Bleh. :PP. Oh shiz, I gots to go. Bye bye Karkat~33

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering CG[carcinoGeneticist]

==  
MS[magicallyScientific] began pestering TA[twinArmageddons]  
MS: WHAT IS SHE DOING?!  
TA: what do you mean?  
MS: IM LOOKING AT MY FRIEND'S LIFELESS BODY HERE.  
MS: WHAT DID SHE DO?!  
TA: iin order to 2ave a certaiin member of your team, 2he had to 2acriifiice her2elf.  
TA: whiile ii don't fully under2tand why, ii do know iit had to be done.  
MS: I-  
MS: I'm just going to...fuck I don't even know.  
MS: I didn't think anyone would really die.  
TA: that ii2 your new realiity.  
TA: don't worry. tho2e of the doom a2pect 2eem to come back. a lot actually. no one truly diie2 iin thii2 game anyway.  
MS: Does this mean I can bring her back? With a kiss?  
TA: no. iit2 too late. ju2t proceed a2 normal.  
MS: I'll try :(.  
TA: 2he would want you to complete your objectiive.  
MS[magicallyScientific] ceased pestering TA[twinArmageddons]

= = Sometime in the future probably like 2-3 weeks

= = Be Amanda

Oh so that's how it's going to be where just going to skip Sara's death and my entrance to the Land of Books and Wind. Well screw you too.

= = Stop being mad and continue into the lair of your denizen

No I'll just sit here and be defiant

= = You and I both know you're bluffing

OH AM I?

= = You can't be serious get up and go down to the lair right NOW YOUNG LADY!

Make me

= = For the love of gravy

Nothing you can say will get me to move

= = FINE SIT THERE

I will

Wait where did you go?

Did you actually leave me here?

What the hell!

FINE IT'S NOT LIKE I WANTED YOUR COMPANY ANYWAY!

MS[ magicallyScientific] began pestering CA[caligalusAquarium]

MS: yo

CA: ah, my lovvely moirail. to wwhat do i owwe the pleasure?

MS: the mystic voice in the sky Abandoned me again and what did i say about always calling me that when i message you amanda works just fine

CA: i apologize. i just wwant to get it right this time.

CA: damn that vvoice

MS: it's just so aggravating a

MS: there was not supposed to be an extra a

CA: i sea you still havvent fixed your keyboard?

MS: cause i TOTALLY have time to fix my keyboard when i'm fighting imps

CA: that aside, there's something else bothering you. tell me, wwhat's wwrong?

MS: THIS STUPID GAME IS WHATS WRONG I HATE IT

CA: i found the game to be fun. especially wwhen i slaughtered all of those horrible angels.

MS: well not all of us are overly found of constant fighting and watching our friends die for no reason

CA: yes. i saww SP died. personally, i am glad. as your moirail, i am sad for you. her dream self may still be alive.

MS: well a lot of good that does me if she is alive i probably won't sea her for ever i mean how the hell would i even get to derse what if im a prospit dreamer i'm never going to sea her again am i

CA: maybe she is not as far awway as you may think.

MS: maybe i still have a little luck left

CA: you wwill alwways havve science. i'm conflicted. i reely feel as if i should tell you about SP, but i will havve VVantas on my ass if i do.

MS: you should definitely tell me, karkat doesn't have to know

CA: you are right. i should not fear that lowwblood. SP is rumored to havve ascended to codtier. i am not awware of wwhen exactly this happened

MS: you are an amazfin person\troll? moirail? okay terms are difficult

CA: i knoww i am. i prefer moirail

MS: you also don't seem to lack modesty xD

CA: of course i don't. i am one of the highest bloods left

MS: hahahahahahahahaha

MS: thanx

MS: i feel better now

MS: ugg this means i have to apologize to the voice

CA: haha. this is wwhy wwe are moirails though. i wwould like to convverse more but i am not sure our communications are entirely privvate.  
CA[caligulasAquarium] ceased trolling MS [magicallyScientific]

Oh well I hope he doesn't get in trouble :\

Yo you up there

I HAVE SOMEFIN TO SAYYY TOOOO YOUUUU

= = I'm listening

Although I don't think it's okay to just brush my friends death of like it was nothing I acted immature and I'm sorry okay

= = It's okay and I understand it's not okay to just sweep character deaths under the rug truce?

Yup

= = Descend

You proceed to descend into the lair

So why did we skip so much?

= = This story is already much to long we had to cut some stuff out

Stuff like a major character death and conversations between us and trolls we ended up befriending?

= = yes

Don't you think that's confusing I mean following the story so far I've had like two convo's with eridan and boom suddenly we're moirails how does that work?

= = It's implied you've had more conversations and eventually became moirails

That seems kind of shady

= = Stop breaking the fourth wall

But I've been doing it the entire story

= = Now enter and meet your denezin

Hold up I need to wiki this before I do anything

Typheus

= = What makes you think its Typheus

Well he's the denezin of breath and I'm pretty sure my aspect is breath because my land is the land of books and wind and last time I checked books were not an aspect

Oh well shoot

= = I see you finally figured it out

You're an ass. Why did you not tell me I had to wake him up

= = I recall you once saying that you didn't need my help and too 'take a hike'

I hate you

= = Have fun discovering your breath powers

Uggggggggggggggggg

MS[magicallyScientific] began pestering EB[ectoBiologist]

MS: Yo, We've never talked before but i need your help

EB: oh, um, alright then random person  
EB: What do you need help with?

MS: HOW DO YOU DO THE WINDY THING

MS: oh names amanda by the way

EB: Oh, hahaha, that's easy!  
EB: You just have to focus and believe.

EB: Nice to meet you amanda.

MS:...believe?

EB:Yeah!  
EB: You have to believe in yourself , you have to be confident that you can do it.

MS: no offence but that is the worst advice anyone has ever given me

MS[magicallyScientific] ceased pestering EB[ectoBiologist]

I don't suppose you have any good advice

= = Actually his advice was excellent

You all suck

= = Just believe in yourself

That's not how things work everything has mechanics behind it I just need to figure it out

= = Have fun trying to figure out how wind works

Watch me

= = Storm out of lair

You make it to the surface and sit down to concentrate

= = Wiki can't help you with this

According to this it says Tavros never learned how to use his. So technically I don't need it.

= = If you want to win the game you do need it

I could just cheat

= = WHAT

Well if I commit suicide on my quest bed I become god tier and can't die, sounds pretty good to me

= = WAIT

Nah I like my plan a lot better

= = Damn it

= = Lets be someone else while she goes and dies

== Be Krystal  
Well, that's kind of obvious. You've always been Krystal, in your Land of Ice and Secrets.

== Explore and catch up.  
Fuck it's cold here. You can't believe just how fucking cold /here is/. You're starting to regret wearing jeans with the knees ripped out.

==

It's pretty neat here though - the little white guys, not to sound racist, have been a big help in finding where your denizen is. Little guys have helped you out a /lot/ since you got here actually. You've decided to 'chill' for a while and get your barrings as he pester Sollux for the umpteenth time in... How long has it been since your house and family have disappeared? Thinking about it makes you upset..

== wish you had Ange to cling to.  
But of course! You have a copy of Ange in your backpack ! You quickly take her out, plop your ass down on a less snow covered rock and hold her close.  
Deep breaths, Krys, deep breaths.

== Calm down and notice someone is already trolling you!  
Oh.. Neat! From the feeling you get, it's not going to be very good news.. Your stomach twists into knots as he bite your lip, and stuff Ange in your hoodie so she auto-cuddles you.  
HN: DUDE, BEFORE YOU START WITH ME, WHATS THE MATTER?!  
TA: ...  
TA: my moiiraiil diied.  
HN: Aw :'( Sara kicked the bucket?  
HN: Whoops. Wrong expression.  
TA: iit2 fiine.  
HN: How'd she die?  
TA: 2he 'fell' off a cliif. then the a22hat fell on top of her. addiing iinsult to iinjury.  
HN: that /totally/ sucks man. I'm sorry.  
HN: wait, why'd you put fell in those '_'?  
TA: her death wa2 no acciident. iit wa2 2taged to look liike one.  
TA: you aren't aware, but there ii2 2omeone who want2 to enter your 2e22ion of 2burb.  
HN: Le gasp! Who is it?  
HN: And by who is it, I mean it's totally Lord English, right?  
TA: ye2. although we troll2 have another name for hiim.  
TA: the angel of double death.  
HN: Yeah, I know. He kind of killed a bunch of ghosts.  
TA: oh fuck ii ju2t made the biigge2t fuckiing mii2take of all.  
HN: I'm sure you didn't.  
TA: ye2 ii diid. iim 2uch a fuckiing iidiiot for realiiziing iit only now.  
TA: FUCK  
HN: Whoa, first of all, what did you even do?  
HN: It can't be that bad, right?  
TA: ii fuckiing opened the gateway for that ba2tard to enter your uniiver2e.  
TA: 2burb wa2 not 2uppo2ed to ho2t a 2e22ion iin your uniiver2e.  
HN: yeah, Sara already said that sometime ago.  
TA: do you know why?  
HN: Nope  
TA: 2iince your uniiver2e hold2 the Hussiie human, iit e2entiially wa2 the begiinniing of our uniiver2e2. Your uniiver2e ii2 the center of all uniiver2e2. every other uniiver2e ii2 created from the iidea2 of your2.  
HN: so what you're saying is that my universe is the center of other universes? Wow, mind=fucking blown man.  
TA: and that ii2 why 2burb can never be played iin iit. iif the center of iidea2 were to be taiinted by the angel of double death, then all uniiver2e2 would become taiinted. al2o, iit wa2 doomed to faiilure not becau2e of a player'2 mii2take but becau2e of a lack of 2pace. 2pace ii2 needed to make the gene2ii2 frog. and 2pace would always be lackiing, no matter whiich one you traveled to.  
HN: Wow this is a lot to take in.  
TA: there2 more.  
TA: ii 2aiid ii opened the gateway, but that wa2n't true. ii only cracked iit.  
TA: iin order for englii2h to enter, he needed a ho2t, much liike 2cratch wa2.  
TA: problem wa2, he diidnt have one. there wa2 no fiir2t guardiian.  
TA: and then ii breached iinto your uniiver2e. thii2 2tarted the proce22 of the fiir2t guardiian'2 creatiion.  
TA: the code2 were D00M, T1M3, SP4C3 and H0P3.  
HN: Holy shit. Good thing I'm sitting down otherwise I probably would've fallen on my ass in the snow. That would not be good for my booty.  
TA: enough about the2e dii2turbiing thiing2. what2 done ii2 done. ii 2en2ed 2omethiing ii2 wrong wiith you.  
HN: It feels a little weird to be talking about this, but I guess I miss my fam and friends. Sure, I've got Amanda and Sara, and sometimes the douchebag. Even that weird kid who watches us from behind stuff. Oh and Hussie too. But I guess it doesn't feel the same as my family, you know?  
TA: ii know. although our famiily uniit2 are diifferent, ii wa2 2liightly 2addened by my lu2u2' death.  
TA: then agaiin, he wa2 prototyped 2o even iin death he wa2 wiith me.

HN: I still kinda have something similar to a lusus I guess you could call it.  
HN: She /was/ a stuffed animal, but I prototyped my sprite with her and my cat.  
HN: I'm actually holding a copy of the original as we speak - she helps a lot when I'm sad..  
HN: If you want, Captor, you have her. I can make more I mean, it's, uh, not like I care you're sad or anything..  
TA:... 2ure why the hell not  
TA: how were you able two tell ii wa2 up2et anyway2?  
HN: the code's G52hnA6 and I'm an empath  
TA: empath?  
HN: someone who can feel another's emotions. It usually happens with people I am emotionally attached to - empathy but more powerful and specific to whatever person is feeling upset.  
HN: like, being able to read someone's mind, but it's their emotions.  
TA: ii 2ee...  
HN: mhmm!~  
HN: So, if theres nothing else you're worried or upset about, I have to get going, my knees are freezing and ange is getting pretty stuffy in my hoodie  
TA: yeah 2ure thiing kt  
TA: ii'll troll you later two keep you up-two-date one everythiing  
HN: sounds good to me Sollux!  
HN: later bro 3  
HyperactiveNovelist[HN] ceased pestering twinArmaggedons[TA]  
TA:...  
TA:...3

== Get back to your quest!

This was a quest? Huh, you wouldn't have known if Jimmeny didn't tell you.  
You put your little tablet away in your backpack and get on with traveling towards your Denizen's lair,

== approach lair

Eventually, you approach your denizen's lair and desire to take a break and fill Amanda in on the situation according to your troll-bro's info.

hyperactiveNoveliat [HN] started pestering magicallyScientific[MS]  
HN: Amanda!  
HN: dude get ooon  
HN: I'll just wait until you reply  
HN: or should I go see my denizen..  
HN: Amanda I need your sicency-self to help meee

MS: yo

MS: I hear you need my help

HN: yeees!  
HN: Sorry, you must've been busy with your own stuff.  
HN: But I'm a little skittish about talking with my Denzin.  
HN: Denizen*

MS: why are you afraid to talk to him/her?

HN: THE THING IS /HUGE/  
HN: I'm pretty sure it could squish me with a finger.. tail, thing.  
HN: I dont know, but I know it's big.

MS: i'm sure it's peacful...probably more than likely

HN: God I hope sooo  
HN: Did you talk with yours yet?

MS: uh

MS: I decided it wasn't worth my time

MS: and im searching for my quest bed

MS: so i can die

MS: and become god tier

HN: I hate that you have to die to reach god teir...  
HS: CRAP, BY THE WAY.  
HN: SP is dead

MS: yeah i know

MS: but she's not really dead

MS: according to eridan she reached god tier and all is well

HN: Thank God!  
HN: I was worried she didn't make it D:  
HN: thanks Amanda c:

MS: no prob but you should reely be thanking eridan

HS: riiight.  
HS: Guess I should get on that now then, huh?  
HS: meeting my denizen thing I mean, Eridan can come later.

MS: yuppers

MS: good luck

HS: Thanks! You too!

MS: im sure dying isn't that difficult

HS: but it must be scary :c  
HS: I wouldn't be able to do it.. _

MS: whale i know im not gonna stay dead so whats to be afraid of

HS: pain D:  
HS: I hate paaain -

MS: good point but im still gonna die

MS: have fun talking to your denizen

MS:g2g

MS[magicallyScientific] ceased pestering HN[hyperactiveNovelist]


	10. Chapter 10

== Be someone else.

= = Be Amanda

So you've decided to come back

= = Well I do need to be here when you die someone needs to narrate it

I feel SO loved

= = I could leave you to die alone

Nah, it's cool you can stay

= = I like how you think it's an option for you

You have left me before, if I reely tried I could probably annoy you away

= = Lets not start this again

Okay. So great and powerful mystic voice where the heck is my quest bed

= = You still haven't found it?

Okay this planet is like huge I mean not the size of earth but there's still A LOT of places to look

= = Would you like directions?

Are they full of riddles and or cryptic

= = Yes…

Than no I do not want your directions

= = But at this rate you're not going to find it anytime soon

Can't you just give me regular directions

= = Why would I do that?

If you do I'll follow orders until I die

= = It would be nice not having you question my every order

Sea it'll be good for both of us. So what do you say?

= = Fine

Yay

= = you have to backtrack to the giant tower of books then walk left for 50 paces then climb that mountain

I have to climb a mountain?!

= = Well if you ever learned the windy thing you wouldn't have to climb

Have I ever told you how much I LOVE rock climbing

= = Backtrack to the tower of books

You do exactly as the voice says without any snark

= = Good, now walk 50 paces to the left

You do this as well, You would complain but you can do that after you die

= = Almost there, Now climb the mountain

This activity is long and challenging, it is riddled with many battles against brigades of imps. You won of course and you have undoubtedly leveled up but as before the only level you care for is god tier.

= = Stare in awe of the slab of rock that is your quest bed

You stare in fake awe

= = Now walk over to it

You walk over to it ((man not being snarky is boring))

= = I can hear your thoughts

You do not respond to this

= = Now roll around on the ground and act foolishly

You do so, you know the voice is TOTALLY DOING THIS FOR REVENGE but a promise is a promise

= = Now message Krystal and be a complete idiot

You do so and you hope krystal will understand

You do so and you hope krystal will understand

MS[magicallyScientific] began pestering HN[hyperactiveNovelist]

MS: KRYSTAL

MS: HOW DO I BREATH

MS: OH GOD IM GOING TO DIE BEFORE I REACH MY QUEST BED

MS: WHICH IS 3 INCHES AWAY

MS: CAUSE I CANT BREATH

MS: OMG HAS THE SKY ALWAYS BEEN BLUE

MS: WHY HAS NO ONE EVER POINTED THIS OUT

HN: AMANDA

HN: WHAT IS GOING ON

HN: ARE YOU OKAY?

MS: KRYSTAL

MS: WHY AM I MESSAGING YOU AGAIN

HN:I DONT KNOW , YOU TELL ME. BUT WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

MS: AM I SUPPOSED TO HAVE 10 FINGERS

HN: OH MY FUCK, YES YOU ARE.

HN: you or something fucked up, didnt you?

HN: WHAT DID YOU DOOO?!

MS: REALLY!

MS: THAT"S AMAZING I"VE NEVER NOTICED

MS: HOW OLD AM I

HN: CRAWL TO YOUR FREAKING QUEST BED.

HN: YOU ARE FOURTEEN

HN: OR FIFTEEN

MS: ARE YOU SURE

HN: I'M HORRIBLE FOR NOT REMEMBERING

HN: JUST GET ON YOUR QUEST BED WHILST I HAVE A PANIC ATTACK

MS: I DON'T KNOW HOW TO TALK

HN: YOU'RE TALKING RIGHT NOW

HN: WHY ARE YOU USING CAPS ?

HN: seriously, the fuck dud

HN: dude

MS[magicallyScientific] is now to stupid to pester HN[hyperactiveNovelist]

HN: OH MY FUCKING GOD

= = Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha hah

= = Okay I'm done now

= = You may now commit suicide on your quest bed

You happily walk over lay down and stab your self in your chest with your awesome spear

= = Now wake up on your quest bed in skaia and dramatically become god tier

How about no, you wake up but you will have none of this dramatic entrance sure it would be cool but you're pissed at the voice

= = Message your friends

Maybe in a bit, you kind of want to explore this really cool looking place

= = Fine

= = Be someone else

== Sara: Ascend  
A bright light engulfes you and you transform into a godtier. After transporting to Skaia of course. A broken spine is not what you needed.

== Look around  
You stare in awe of the pretty blue sky. A helpful little carapace hands you a sword with your aspect etched onto it.

== Hold sword up in triumph  
You do as such. It doesn't feel the same as your lovely frying pan. Damn it, you miss your frying pan dearly.

== Press a button  
There's buttons on your sword. You press the green one and your sword magically changes to a frying pan. Ah, much better.

== Quit it.  
The wind feels so nice though!

== Get moving and find your friend  
Fine, you mumble scornfully.

== Epic journey time!  
Will there be a montage?

== Yes  
LET'S DO THIS BITCHES

== Be Karkat  
You stare in awe as your flush crush becomes godtier. She's wearing the same pajamas as Strider, though they're green and black with the symbol of Doom etched across her chest.

== Ok, that's enough Doom time  
Honestly. Doom is so self-centered. Yet so easy to manipulate ahahaha! Ahem. Anyway, onto the next person

== Be the Heir of Heart  
You are now the heir of heart. After speaking with your denizen you have decided on an answer for /The Choice/ you promptly flop your ass down with Ange, and your Axe on the stone slab. You're just about to drop it on your neck when..

== Answer your blackcrush  
He can /so/ fucking wait. Doesn't he realize you have important shit to do? Smug bastard.

caligousAquarium [CA] began trolling hyperactiveNovelist [HN]  
CA: wwell I see youre tryin to kill yourself Krys  
HN: fuck off ampora I'm busy gouging my eyes out  
CA: I wwas under the impression you wwere goin to drop your Axe on that pretty little annoyin neck a yours  
HN: says the fishfucker that messaged me first  
HN: what's the point of you trolling me anyways?  
CA: I wwas gettin to that, shut up  
CA: you might as wwell not evven try an help, I mean you could  
CA: but it'd be completely fuckin useless  
HN: what the fuck dude?  
HN: Aren't you suppose to be the PRINCE OF FUCKING HOPE?  
HN: 'it's fuckin useless'  
HN: you know what? MORE THAN HALF of my fucking life has been spent letting people tell me the shit I do is useless and I fucking believed them!  
HN: I've always wanted to do something bigger than myself, something to /help people/.  
HN: I don't want anyone else to fucking die without a reason!  
HN: and no, before your fingers even TOUCH a button, I'm not talking about ' oh well it's the game so no one ever really dies for certain'  
HN: NO, FUCK THAT MENTALITY OF YOURS OUT A WINDOW AND ONTO A BED OF SPIKES.  
HN: DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE SCARED OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND WHEN THE THOUGHT OF SEEING SOMEONE YOU CARE ABOUT, someone you ADORE and cherish, gets taken away from you again?!  
HN: I'D rather die saving a friend, than sitting on my ass and waiting for something to track said ass down and kill me without a fight!  
HN: do you know what happens when Lord English finds us?  
HN: GAME. FUCKING. OVER.  
HN: He kills us and we're DONE.  
HN: before you start fucking arguing with me, would you enjoy seeing your friends die?  
HN: YOUR MOIRAIL FOR GOD'S SAKE.  
HN: I'd /gladly/ fight tooth and nail for friends, Hell, even people I don't know personally.  
HN: so, as a final 'fuck you, prince of negativity' I'm sliding my throat with this fuckin Axe and helping out, fucker  
hyperactiveNovelist [HN] ceased pestering the astounded caligousAquarium [CA]  
CA:... holy shit

== Be done with this and slice your throat  
You pick your Axe up, easily keeping a grip on it and Ange, and whisper an apology to your stuffed companion before kissing her head and doing yourself in as you must.

==Ascend Heir  
You ascend, in a bright blaze of glory and magic . your in yellowish gold, and in a golden city..  
What should you do?

== Swap to someone else.


	11. Chapter 11

== Sara  
You are now Sara again. That montage was beast. You gleefully hold a few copies of it to your chest.

==  
On second thought, it'd be better if you stored these somewhere. Thank gog you figured out how to use the sword. You press the blue button and it changes into a chest.

==  
You place the DVDs next to a pile of some really shitty drawings of your OTP. You wished you could draw as well as your bronie friends.

== Oh well  
Hey look! You notice a figure looming behind a boulder. It's Andrew Hussie! He's been stowed away on your planet for a while. He must've hid on Skaia.

== run to your true love  
You float over to the man hiding behind the rock. No matter what anyone says, Hussie will always be beautiful.

== :DD  
Dialog:  
Hussie: Oh god, it's like the tricksters all over again.  
Sara: Hehe, I always act like this around you Hussie~  
Hussie: What do you want?  
Sara: Since my Doomy powers have heightened, I'm here to tell you that we're not as doomed as I thought!  
Sara: There is one single instance where we prevailed.  
Sara: And if we can make that instance the Alpha timeline then hey, we're good to fucking go.  
Hussie: And why am I here?  
Sara: I told you.  
Sara: The universe likes you.  
Sara: Like really likes you.  
Sara: Like I think it has a cult.  
Hussie: The universe has a cult with me as the center.  
Hussie: Damn.  
Sara: Oh! I'm the vice-president of the cult!  
Sara: And the treasurer and the secretary.  
Sara: ANYWAY, the single instance where we won wasnfhdiencuendid  
Hussie: What?  
Sara: Fuck. I can't tell you now. Once the POV has switched, then I'll be able to inform you.  
Hussie: Why is that exactly?  
Sara: Because A) it will give away spoilers and B) There's a certain someone listening in on this conversation.  
Sara: We're not exactly entitled to privacy DX.  
Hussie: Well, we can just wait, right?  
Sara: Yep! I can tell you that it has something to do with who's controlling the arrows.  
Hussie: I was a little curious about that. Like, if I'm not the one narrating, then who is? I guessed it was Ms Paint or something. Or an Exile.  
Sara: Nope. Wrong~. It's-

== msmsmsmsmmsmsmsmmsmsmsmsm  
Whelp. Something has whacked you over the head, rendering you unconscious.

== Be someone else

= = Lets go see what Amanda is up too

Yo, you've returned

= = No really?

Hey im supposed to be the sarcastic one here

= = What are you doing?

Well seeing as I left my spear with my body I need a new one and that carapace over there has one

= = So you're going to steal it?

Yup

= = Fine

You jump the poor little carapace and fly off with his spear

= = Now what?

I think I'll message some people

= = Like who?

Well I'm going to create a group chat

= = Why?

Cause I have nothing else to do

= = Create group chat already

On it

MS [magicallyScientific] created a group chat

MS: hi

SP: Amanda!

MS: SARA

SP: I'm not as dead as we thought hehe. Now Leon is the only one not GT. I'll go fix that.

MS: ugg no don't make him god tier let him die

SP: Im sorry. I cant do that. Hey, have you seen Hussie around?

MS: i haven't seen anybody i've been alone like the entire game well except for mystic voice

SP: Haha well I was just knocked out and he kind of disappeared. I was going to reveal everything to him

SP: including why he was even here in the first place

MS: thats cool

MS: this isn't much of a group chat

SP: No its not.

SP: Its like one of Karkat's memos!

MS: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

SP: Except without all of the tween troll drama :/

SP: My OTP sunk btw

SP: No NepKar TT-TT\

MS: nooooooooo

SP: Its upsetting. I guess I'll have to hope for KrysxSol or maybe ErixKrys or any weird combo of those three...

MS: i have no response for that

SP: Haha. XD. So~ I assume you did this group chat thing for a reason?

MS: yup

SP: And what is that reason exactly?

SP: Im just wondering

MS: i made this because im stuck here on skaia bored out of my mind and if i have to sit here and have another conversation about how uncooperative i am with that damn voice im going to lose my mind

SP: Oh. Thats a shame. Maybe you can talk to one of the carapaces? They're great handymen/women. Plus, theyre fawking adorable.

MS: nah i just jumped one of them for a spear i don't think they would be to happy to see me

SP: Aw. B-but theyre so adorable! Hey, what's Krsytal been up to since I died? You know, if we're both on Skaia, wouldnt it be easier to meet up?

MS: probably and i don't know i havent messaged her i was hopeing she would be here but apparently no one wants to talk to me

SP: Aw poor Amanda DX. Im sure one of the trolls would love to talk! Like dear sweet, precious Nepeta. Or maybe one of the kids? Idk if that works...I havent tried yet.

MS: i've talked to john then told him his advice was useless and disconnected

SP: LOL. OMG Amanda. That sounds just like you.

MS: i have horrible people skills

SP: Im sure John didnt mind much. You just gotta believe in the fairies Amanda~!

MS: no

SP: This is why you cant do the Windy Thing~!

MS: im god tier now i can fly without the windy thing

SP: XP. Well its best to understand one's powers fully. You're not just of Breath. Your class is Slyph ya know.

hyperactiveNovelist [HN] has joined the group chat!

HN: OH MY GOD, THERE'S ALREADY SHIPPING GOING ON FOR : have I told you guys how much I looove you? c:.

MS: not recently

SP: Haha its fiiiiiinnneeee

HN: I should more often then!  
HN: I think john's advice was pretty good too Amanda!

SP: Someone agrees with meh~

MS: it's the worst advice ever

SP: Maybe thats your challenge? Doing something you wouldnt normally do to overcome adversity? Skaia is where you grow as a person after all.

SP: Maybe thats your challenge? Doing something you wouldnt normally do to overcome adversity? Skaia is where you grow as a person after all.

MS: you can not be serious

SP: Oh, but I am :D

HN: I agree! It'd be kinda funny seeing the woman of science believe in magic like I do :D

MS: i hope you all suffer

SP: Haha yes. I already died once today, I dont mind doing it again...

HN: OH, that reminds me!

HN: I sucked it up and reached GT :

MS: cool

SP: XD. Congrats.

HN: and actually kinda grew a spine. MS, sorry if you have to hear about me bein a bitch towards ampora though.

HN: he was being depressing :c.

MS: ...

HN: aren't you his moirail?

SP: He's a douchebag of hope. Its his thing to be depressing.

HN: that is true

MS: okay whoa people

MS: Krystal yes

MS: Bad sara

MS: very very bad

SP: DX. Sowwy.

SP: Im sowwy. I should just die again..

MS: NO

HN: NO

HN: DONT DIIIE

HN: AGAIN I MEAN

SP: Speaking of dying, youve both died at least 20 times since we've entered the game..

MS: really

HN: I don't remember D:

SP: Yeah

SP: You dont remember because of the timeline righting itself thing.

HN: how'd I die? O- 0

SP: Sometimes you were maimed, or cut into little pieces or just had the shittiest luck. I remember because I saw it with my Doomy powers. In fact, I've told you 413 times about your deaths.

MS: it's always 413

SP: Its the number of the blind prophet!

SP: You cant disregard the blind prophet!

MS: just like how i can't disobey the mystic voice?

SP: Exactly.

MS: sarcasm

SP: DX. You know, the blind prophet emerges in almost every session. True prophets dont need sight

MS: well none of us are blind

HN: THAT EXPLAINS TEREZIII

SP: H3h3

SP: w3ll, 1'll l3t you sp3cul4t3

HN: possibly fiture sollux, but god, I don't wanna think about iiit.

HN: MITUNA

HN: I think it's mituna.

SP: Hmm, m4yb3? My poor, sw33t M1tun4.

HN: or, there's always Tula...

SP: Y3ah th3r3 1s

HN: CALLED IIIT, it's so totally Tula.

SP: m4yb3. m4yb3 not? who r34lly knows?

MS: its sara

MS: you're gonna go blind and become the prophet

SP: 4m 1? 1 could b3 typ1ng l1k3 th1s to confus3 you.

HN: dammit, all my guesses sucked

HN: You're like a girl version of the Chesrie Cat, Sara, I think you almost do everything for a reason that sometimes involves confusing us for our own good.

HN: Cheshire

SP: Well, I am a Knight of Doom. Exploiting my aspect as a weapon :P

MS: that's it

SP is now banned

SP: Bye bye~! Im off to save your asses again~!

MS: g2g

HN: .. but ; - ; all right guys, later then! I'll be off, exploring!

MS has unbanned SP

= = Go find Sara

Do you just sit there and read our conversation?

= = It's my job

Creeeeeepy

= = Go find your friend

Aiy aiy captain

= = Be someone else

== Be the Heir  
Well, all right then. But weren't we already the Heir?

== Too bad, go at it again.  
All right, all right, no need to be so testy , sir...

== Get moving!  
FIIINE. God.

==  
You get your ass moving. Regardless of how awesome you look in red and pink, and the way you wanna wield your battle axe up in the ai- ...

== Just do it already!  
Fuck /yes/.

==  
You wield your axe proudly, high above your head with a grin plastered widely on your befreckled pale face. Seriously, how can someone NOT die from being this excited? The grin still in place, you pat one of your little helpers on the head, and give him a quick hug before rushing off in search of your companions. Oh god, you can't /wait/ to see them IRL!

== Ask around for directions.  
Couldn't I ask you?

== What do you mean?  
You made a deal with Amanda...I know things dude, I could just time skip right up to the part wher-

== No, out of the question, and why would you want to when you're already preoccupied with being trolled?  
.. dangit, fine, all right, you win this once. I'll answer my laptop that I suddenly have because of reasons.

== Answer laptop you have because of reasons.

twinArmaggedons [TA] began trolling hyperactiveNovelist [HN]

TA: congrat2 on reachiing gt kt

HN: haha, thanks sollux!  
TA: youre welcome ii gue22  
HN: ^-^ Guess so.  
TA: ii heard you fliipped out on ed though, hii2 face wa2 hiilariiou2  
TA: ii hope you know he wont let go of that though, riight?  
HN: .. shit.. wait, you heard?  
TA: everyone ha2  
TA: you miight want to lay low for a whiile and try not two pii22 hiim off 2o much anymore  
HN: why the hell would i do that? Pissing him off's fun!  
TA: ehehehe iit ii2  
TA: but you're not really the only one that ha2 two deal wiith iit, and a2 much a2 ii love watchiing you pii22 hiim off, everyone el2e here ha2 two deal wiith hii2 biitchiing  
HN: all right, fine, i'll stop picking on him for a while.. v - v  
TA: thank2 and good luck. 3  
twinArmaggedons [TA] ceased trolling hyperactiveNovelist [HN]  
HN: .. HOLY SHIT.

== Wake up  
You wake up. Who were you again? Oh yeah, Sara.

==  
Whoa, what the fuck happened while you were sleeping? Where's Hussie?

== Freak the fuck out  
You proceed to do so.

== Answer pester chat

CG[carcinoGeneticist] began trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

CG: OK, LOOK, IM SORRY IF I UPSET YOU.  
SP: Oh, hey, hi Karkat!  
SP: Um...what are you talking about?  
SP: Heh, I kind of got knocked on the head.  
SP: 20 n0ww my h34d2 4 l1ttle fuzzy.  
CG: FUCK  
CG: FUCKITY FUCK FUCK  
SP: Karkat?  
SP: You ok?  
CG: NO, IM NOT "OK." YOU FUCKING FORGOT WHAT HAPPENED LIKE TEN MINUTES AGO.  
SP: Oh, you mean when you confessed?  
SP: Dude, that's old news.  
SP: So ten minutes ago.  
CG: WHAT.  
CG: HGHJVGJVUFUGUCUGY  
SP: :?  
SP: Mou. Well I'm sorry I can't reciprocate your feelings.  
SP: Or m4yb3 1 c4n.  
SP: You n3v3r know.  
CG: PLEASE DON'T.  
SP: Ok :(. What's wrong dahling? Talk to me.  
CG: I DON'T THINK I SHOULD TALK ABOUT THIS TO YOU.  
SP: How bout Sollux? He's kind of like me?  
SP: I mean, he'd understand.  
CG: YEAH, I'LL DO THAT.  
CG: KARKAT OUT.  
CG: FUCK YOU.  
SP: Love you too :PP 33  
CG[carcinoGeneticist] ceased trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

==  
You probably shouldn't have said that last thing. Oh fuck.

== Who's there?  
You hear a sound and go to investigate.

== O.O  
It's...it's...

==  
Gamzee?!

== Uh, you might want to run  
Yeah, you might be fucked. Royally.

== Scream like a girl  
You let out the loudest, girliest scream you've ever uttered. Gamzee simply grins, holding up Nepeta's claws. Your blood chills.

== Run bitch run  
You turn tail and run.

== NO!  
He catches up with you. Fear settles in the pit of your stomach as his iron clad grip strengthens.

==  
Dialog:  
Gamzee: I KNOW WHAT YOU DID.  
Gamzee: naughty little human.  
Sara:...  
Gamzee: TIME TO REPENT.

==  
You let out the most blood curling scream ever heard across all of the universes. It shakes the nearby carapaces to the core. They proceed to explode.

== X.X  
It's all over. Gamzee disappears but you still feel his claws around your arms.

==  
You feel your face but it's all sticky and wet. You can't tell if your eyes are opened or closed.

== Answer pester log  
You proceed to have this *long* conversation.

== Break down mentally  
You start crying and screaming. Since this entire game started, you haven't shed a single tear until now. You can't take it anymore. Dying was too hard on you. This new development just made you snap completely.

== ...

TA[twinArmageddons] began trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

TA: oii! you better be careful!  
TA: gamzee dii2appeared and iim worriied he miight go after you.  
TA: 2p? 2ara? an2wer me!  
SP: Sollux?  
TA: thank gog.  
SP: I can't see.  
SP: Why can't I see?!  
TA: calm down.  
TA: what do you mean you can't 2ee.  
SP: I CAN'T SEE.  
SP: MY EYES AREN'T WORKING.  
TA: FUCK. ii wa2 too late.  
TA: how are you readiing thii2?  
SP: I don't know. I just know your responses. It was like that with the group chat.  
SP: Sollux I can't take it anymore.  
SP: I can't.  
TA: ii wii2h you were born on alterniia. then ii would be able to help you.  
TA: and do a2 you 2ay the '2hoo22h pap' actiion.  
SP: I guess that makes me feel better.  
SP: Should I steal Terezi's numbers now?  
SP: Like I foreshadowed in the chat?  
TA: a2k her.  
SP: I will. She can keep her emoticons though.  
SP: Thank you Sol.  
TA: anytiime.

TA[twinArmageddons] ceased trolling SP[samuraiPonytail]

==  
You feel lighter now. Time to talk to Terezi.

==

SP[samuraiPonytail] began pestering GC[gallowsCalibrator]

SP: Terezi?  
GC: WHO GO3S TH3R3?  
SP: Uh, hi, my name is Sara.  
SP: And Gamzee just kind of blinded me.  
SP: Even though I'm Godtier.  
GC: OH H3H3. B4D LUCK DUD3.  
SP: Gee thanks.  
SP: Not like I just went through a whole fuck load of emotional trauma.  
SP: As if dying and keeping everyone safe wasn't enough.  
GC: SORRY.  
GC: WH4T D1D YOU N33D, N3WLY BL1ND D1SC1PL3?  
SP: Um...  
SP: This is slightly awkward.  
SP: I was wondering if I could use 413? Like you, but with proper capitalization.  
GC: 1S TH4T WH4T YOU N33D3D? SUR3. 1 DON'T C4R3. KNOCK YOURS3LF OUT.  
GC: B3S1D3S YOU T4ST3 L1K3 COTTON C4NDY. :]  
SP: Th4nk you, oh w1s3 on3.  
GC: H3H3 1 L1K3 YOU. ;]

SP[samuraiPonytail] ceased pestering GC[gallowsCalibrator]

== Sigh  
You flop onto your back. Your face still hurts. You know without a doubt it won't heal. Ever.

== Grr  
Another person pestering you. Can't the world leave you alone for five seconds?!

== Be someone else.  
You are someone else.


	12. Chapter 12

= = AMANDA

What?

= = I THOUGHT YOU WERE LOOKING FOR SARA

I'm sure she's fine

= = WILL YOU FOR ONCE JUST TRUST ME

What happened?

= = I CAN'T TELL YOU

Well how am I supposed to trust you if you never tell me what you know?

= = CAN'T YOU JUST TRUST I'M DOING THE RIGHT THING

No

= = Would you still ignore me if it meant neglecting your friends when they need you most?

I'll go back to searching

You explore for what feels like hours, you talk to hundreds of carapaces none of which have seen your friend. Just as you've given up you come across the remains of some carapaces. You don't think Sara killed them but maybe another player is nearby.

You fly a bit further and find a young girl the same age as you with short black hair sitting alone

= = Talk to your friend

Dialog:  
Sara: Who's there?

Amanda: yo it's me

Sara: AMANDA?!  
Sara: G-GO AWAY

Amanda: dude

Amanda: whats wrong

Amanda: wheres my awesome hug

Amanda: from my best friend

Sara: I don't want you to see me like this.

Amanda: then i'll close my eyes

Amanda: there now my eyes are closed

Sara: TT-TT

Amanda: don't cry

Sara: I can't cry.  
Sara: My eyes can no longer see.

Amanda: you can still feel like your going to cry and even with my eyes closed i can tell that you want to cry

Amanda: and not to sound like an ass

Amanda: but i

Amanda: CALLED IT

Sara: It's fine. *sniff*  
AMANDA  
== Give her a hug!  
You are tackled by a blind, sobbing mess known as your best friend.

==  
dialog:

Amanda: Sara everything's gonna be okay

Sara: Wah! I missed you so much Amanda!

Amanda: i missed you too

Sara: It hurts so much.  
Sara: My face feels like a chainsaw ripped through it.

Amanda: really? it looks like you were mauled by an angry kitty but if you say chainsaw then chainsaw it is

Sara: It was Gamzee. I should have seen this coming.

Amanda: man being blinded by your least favorite character

Amanda: you are having one hell of a shitty day

Sara: Yes. :((.

Amanda: we should go find a Mcdonalds and steal all of the kiddy toys

Sara: Hehe, that seems like fun.

Amanda: and you don't need to see to enjoy eating greasy food and you can still smell and touch

Amanda: and now you never have to get up and turn the light off cause you can't sleep

Sara: I guess you're right.  
Sara: It's just been a hard day what with all the dying and then the eyes getting blinded.  
Sara: Thank you.

Amanda: what are friends for

Sara: H3h3 th4nk you 4g41n.  
Sara: 4nyw4y, wh3r3 do w3 go from h3r3?

Amanda: Whale i'm done for finding a Mcdonalds but the chances of that are very slim

Amanda: maybe mystic voice has an idea

Sara: You n3v3r know.  
Sara: You should not trust the vo1c3 so 3s1ly.

Amanda: Hey i know it's weird getting directions from a voice but it does tend to lead you the right way and has your best interests in mind although it gets mad when you cheat

Sara: Y3s but th3 vo1c3 do3s th1ngs 1n 1ts b3st 1nt3r3st.

Amanda: Well why can't our interests coincide?

Sara: Trust m3. Th3 vo1c3 only looks out for 1ts3lf.

Amanda: rawr

Amanda: well it cant hurt to ask

Yo you listening up there?

= = Yes

opinions?

= = Well I think you should go like for krystal

Amanda: Sara?

Sara: Yeah?

Amanda: What do you think?

Sara: It wouldn't hurt to look.

Amanda: We're off to see the heir the wonderful heir of... Skaia doesn't exactly replace OZ to well

Sara: No, it doesn't. But let's just pretend we're off to see the Wizard of Oz.

Amanda: yay

= = Be someone else

== Once again, you are the Heir.  
Yay!~

== Proceed to look around.  
You do as Jimmeny says and proceed to check stuf- .. oh shit.

== NOPENOPENOPE  
You find some fresh blood - /red/ blood. The kind of red you would expect from a certain troll, but god, no, he couldn't be here right now. It's not plausible!

== Follow the trail.  
Reluctantly, you fallow the trail as a shiver runs down your spine. You don't like it here, but for someone in need, you'll do anything.

==  
Upon following the trail, you discover at the end of it is your internetbros. Amanda, and Sara.  
The sight makes you grin and want to cry as you rush over.

== Notice the blood.  
OH SHIT. You finally notice where the blood came from, and your stomach lurches at the thought. Your face turns pale, and you have to pull your messy brown hair up into a pony tail out of nervous and sick habit.

Dialog:  
Krystal: .. shit.. dude, you okay?

Sara: I would like to be sarcastic but this situation is delicate.

Amanda: i don't think this really requires that much tack sara

Sara: No. Im not okay. I kind of got my eyes scratched out by Gamzee. Just when I was starting to like that fucker too.

Amanda: and all i would like to say is CALLED IT

Sara: Yep. You called it.

Sara: It's fine. I've come to terms with it. I knew I was going blind since before we entered the Medium. It wasn't clear how though, probably since it was Gamzee. He has this habit of being a blind spot.

Krystal: I still feel bad though.. I was dicking around and you got hurt...

Amanda: Dude i was playing tricks on the carapaces you were probably doing something productive whale i just acted like a child when my best friend was getting her eyes gouged out

Sara: It would have happened whether I was with someone or alone.  
Sara: And then you would feel worse.  
Sara: It's seriously fine guys.  
Sara: It's my curse for having the Doomy powers,

Krystal: .. still..  
Krystal: .. well, if that's your curse, wouldn't it make sense for all of us to have curses related to our abilities?

Amanda: I SWEAR TO GOD IF I'M DOOMED TO BELEIVE IN MAGIC I WILL END ALL OF YOU

Sara: No.  
Sara: Doom is a special case.  
Sara: It's all about sacrifice and what you're willing to sacrifice.  
Sara: You won't be cursed to believe in magic Amanda.  
Sara: Magic isn't real.  
Sara: Majyyk however, is totally real.

Amanda: can I quit

Krystal: hehehe, no you can not, and all right then Sara!~

Sara: Never. Just believe Amanda~!  
Sara: Believe in what your heart us saying. Hear the melody that's playing. There's no time to waste there's so much to celebrate. Believe in what you feel inside and give your dreams the wings to FLY!  
Sara: You have everything you need if you just BELIEVE.

Amanda: Fuck no

Sara: Oh come on. I sang Believe.  
Sara: I'll keep singing it too,

Krystal: I'll join in!.

Amanda: you can sing till your throats bleed nothing will change

Sara: IT WILL.  
Sara: YOU'LL SEE.  
Sara: ~Water tribe~

Amanda: water tribe?

Krystal: .. I still wanna do it...

Sara: I thought of Sokka...  
Sara: We shall sing at dawn O.O

Amanda: none of that made sense

Sara: I think Gamzee's hands were covered in slime...  
Sara: Or maybe I'm delusional from this blood loss.  
Sara: I mean, fuck, there's a trail Amanda, a trail!

Amanda: a trail?

Krystal: Dude, she's right!

Sara: Krystal followed it here,

Sara: H3h3 Prosp1t dr34m3rs g3t fr33 loll1pops. Us D3rs1t3s g3t 4ss4ssins.

Amanda: okay so there's a trail what are we going to do about it?

Krystal: what if at the end of it we find Gamzee? We could probably take him.

Sara: Nothing. It means I've lost a lot of blood. So if I seem loopy now you know why.

Sara: No.  
Sara: He left immediately after.  
Sara: The next time we see him will be during a critical meeting.

Amanda: so what do we do now?

Krystal: more importantly, what the hell is the 'critical meeting'?

Sara: You will see.  
Sara: I forget not everyone has Doomy powers or powers of foresight.  
Sara: They're like rainbows maaaaaan

Amanda: that's great sara but seriously are we all just gonna stand here waiting for something to happen?

Sara: Shhhhh  
Sara: They'll hear you.  
Sara: Shhhhh.

Amanda: if you haven't noticed IT'S JUST US STANDING ALONE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE

Krystal: .. I'm pretty sure we should find some coconuts. Not because they're food, but we can use the water inside for plasma in Sara's blood stream. She's lost a lot already.

Amanda: where are we going to get coconuts and what? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS

Sara: GAH  
Sara: THE WHITE CHICK IS GOING TO FIND US!  
Sara: YOU'VE BROUGHT ABOUT OUR DOOM AMANDA!  
Sara: DOOM!  
Sara: THE MOTHER WILL BE VERY ANGRY!  
Sara: AND WHEN ALL IS LOST, THE GREAT FORCE WILL STRIKE DOWN OUR FOES.  
Sara: AND WE SHALL BE RENEWED.  
Sara: Coconuts sound pretty good right now.

Amanda: that's it im leaving

Krystal:.. C'mon . dude, you're not leaving yet! You could ATLEAST help me carry heeer!

Amanda: WHERE ARE YOU PLANNING ON TAKING HER

Krystal: I don't know! WHERE THE HELL DO YOU PLAN ON GOING?! Cuz it sure as hell isn't going to be very far if Makara is chasing our asses down!

Amanda: she just said we aren't going to see him again until some important meeting

Amanda: and im getting away from this craziness

Krystal: How do you know the meeting isn't right around the corner?  
Krystal: or if something worse is near by!

Amanda: I don't but i think im okay with that

Sara: Wait! THE MOTHER WILL GROW ANGRIER!  
Sara: Amanda, wait ten more seconds.  
Sara: Ten more.

Amanda: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT

Sara: How do you not know who the Mother is?  
Sara: I mean, it's pretty obvious.  
Sara: Oh look! There it is!  
Sara: Hi John!

Amanda: that's it logic no longer exists

Krystal: .. where the fuck is John? o - o  
Krystal: I FEEL LIKE ALICE IN WONDERLAND. OH MY GOD.  
Krystal: Sara, you're the mad hatter, and Amanda's the only logical one!

Sara: Are you feeling it now Amanda?  
Sara: Whatever the Mother says is law~  
John: Howdy!

Amanda: i give up

= = have a mental breakdown

A little late to the party with that one misty

Sara: I told you not to talk to the arrows!  
Sara: They're eeeeeevil~~~~~!

Krystal: John, John, oh my god.  
Krystal: Where the heck is everyone else?

Amanda: WHO'S THE MOTHER

Amanda: WHATS GOING ON

Sara: John~~~!  
John: hi um, Sara?  
John: Karkat sent me.  
Sara: Er Mer Gerd.  
Sara: It's time!

= = Amanda is currently lying on the ground crying and refuses to participate in further conversation

Krystal: AMANDA GET YOUR ASS UP.  
== Krystal, pick up your difficult friend.

= = Continue to sob on the ground

Sara: Amanda! We're going to leave without you!  
Sara: Get yo jive ass up!

Amanda: whe-where ar-re we go-in-g

Sara: A place full of wonders.

John: wonders? I wouldn't call it that

Amanda: Wi-ll st-t-tuff ma-ake sen-se ag-g-ain

Sara: It depends on who you are.

Sara: Just come! You're imperative to the plan

Amanda: f-fine b-but yo-you o-owe m-me

Sara: Ok. Let's go~! We're off to see the Wizard~! the wonderful wizard of Oz!

Krystal: .. I thought i was the wizard..?  
== Help Amanda to her feet and pat her back.

Sara: We're all wizards ahahahaha!  
John: we should probably see a doctor about this. or Rose. Rose is good.

Krystal: Rose and Kanaya.. because I trust them a little more than everyone else.. no offense dude.

John: oh it's ok!  
Sara: What are we doing here?! Let's fucking go already!

Krystal: Fiiine. John, you help Sara move since she's blind, and I'll get Amanda. Kay?

Sara: Finally! Let's blow this popsicle stand!  
Sara: I've always wanted to say that.


End file.
